Archive for September, 2005
Batman Begins?
My daughter is playing with some Batman toys I just pulled down off my wardrobe. The cast is: Batman, Catwoman, Robin, Joker, Riddler. Here’s the dialogue:
Catwoman: I’m running after the cats.
Joker: I don’t know. I don’t know. I’m going to punch you after.
Batman: I’m the good guy.
Batman: I’m an angry guy. I’ll punch you after. No, I’m a good guy. I’m not an angry guy.
Robin: Well punch her after already.
(Joker proceeds to beat everyone up).
Catwoman: Hey hey hey. Why you guys are all fighting?
(Catwoman beats everyone up).
Catwoman: You’re in the parking lot. I’ll punch you after, too.
Riddler: No, I already did that. It’s the bad guy’s time already.
Robin: No you’re not. You’re not to punch all the people.
Catwoman: That’s the way we do it.
Batman: No no.
(Riddler beats everyone up).
Batman: I’ll punch you to the North Pole.
Joker: No, no no, I’ll punch YOU already.
Batman: I’ll punch you after.
(continue for minutes…)
In a way, this is really funny/precious. In another way, this kid hasn’t seen a superhero cartoon (that I know of). How’d she know the default of superhero activities is punching each other out? More to the point, WHY is that the default? Like… I grew up worshipping comics. I still read the occasional comic book. I am a total freak for Batman, for instance. Okay, not really a total freak. I don’t rate as “fanboy” or anything.
But whoa. It’s weird to watch your 3 year old daughter act out a beatdown.
RSS Reading
(I swear, this is not an info-mercial):
Are you using Bloglines to stay current with the blogs you like to read? If so, I have a potential alternative to recommend. I just started using Feed-Tank, and I like the layout. I think this is running Ruby on Rails, but then, I’d have to ask a new-found techy blogger that I like if he agrees.
If you’re not using any kind of news aggregator and you’re visiting people’s sites one at a time, I strongly recommend you consider upgrading to an RSS reader. If nothing else, you can read more people’s stuff without as much clicking and poking around. It’s a really great way to research things, but it’s also a good way to stay in touch with your friends’ blogs. I’m finding that I need to use RSS aggregators like Feed-Tank to stay up on your blogs, because I just don’t have the time to set aside for reading the way I did last year.
Anyhow, that’s my two dollars and twelve cents.
Dig In. Dig In. Repeat. Repeat.
I have something to admit: I never really understood it when people were in a fitness slump. What was the big deal? You get it, right? You understand all the reasons WHY. You have all the motivation you could possibly ask for. Why bother?
Really, I just figured you were lazy, or weak, or not motivated enough. There must be something wrong with you. “You” = anyone else.
I guess I’m either just as lazy, or maybe there’s something more to it all. Maybe the education and the motivation aren’t enough. I don’t know. I do know that I’m up a good 15 pounds from when I was at my best last summer. I do know that I hit the skids around the time that I injured my shoulder. I do know that I haven’t been as interested in fitness since the demands of work started weighing me down.
I also know that it’s really hard to pick up the rope and pull. In fact, it’s a lot like pushing a rope. You’ve heard that expression, right? It means trying to do something when you’re not on the right side of it. Something like that. Kind of like talking about things that are futile. Anyway, that’s what it feels like lately.
My clothes are getting tighter. I’m probably not *really* wearing size large anymore. I’m just kind of stretching them to fit that size. I could just as easily go up a waist size and a shirt size. I don’t want this. Partly, I don’t want to admit defeat. The other part: I donated all my older clothes. So, I’ve got no real choice, unless I want to have that miserable shopping experience.
But what? What gets me moving? Where’s that kick in the pants? I’ve been doing dribs and drabs. Two exercise days a week. Mind you, this is up from zero or one. But two. That’s nothing. And I’m definitely not eating on plan.
Self esteem is at stake here. I already hear the Critic. He’s saying, “Heh. I waited you out, fuckface. You’re a failure. You’re a loser. This was just another thing you did for a year and got out of. Like everything else. Lifelong habits, my ass.” This could go on without end, by the way. I’m just giving you a sample.
The Critic, of course, is tied to everything else. The failure begets the Critic begets the low self-esteem begets the lack of motivation to do something.
But I’ll tell you what. I’ll tell you what I’m doing about this. I’m not fucking stopping. I’m pushing where I can. I’m making the right choices when I can. I’m adding little bits of fitness wherever I can. And I’m reminding myself that little victories add to bigger ones. I’m reminding myself that I’ve done this before, and I’ve got success and history on my side. I’m going to dig in. I’m going to keep fighting the failures and move forward.
And I’m going to keep reporting it, good and bad. I’m going to cover everything. One way or another, you’ll be able to read the outcome.
Oh, and I’m sorry for any negative thought I ever had in your direction when you were feeling weak or down or unmotivated. I get it.
