Be Realistic About Time

kilter Something’s happened to our expectations. In my lifetime, I have seen the expectation of a response in business dwindle down from two days to no more than a few hours. Mostly, it’s my web friends to blame. Offline-only people don’t seem as frantic about their pace, but my connections via the web? If two or three hours pass between the time I receive a direct message on Twitter, or an email, I’ll get the opposite piece of correspondence asking me if I received the message (If someone sends me a tweet, I’ll get an email asking if I received it, and vice versa). Text messages slip past my screen asking if I saw the email come in.

When did we start expecting this kind of turnaround? When did we all opt to be Pavlov to the dinging bell? Who said this was how business gets done?

Equally interesting is that this seems to be the expecation regardless of time of day, and on weekends as well. I received a query on Saturday evening, and found a somewhat more anxious email in my box before noon on Sunday.

We’re all to blame. It’s no one person’s fault. But it doesn’t have to be like this. We can reinstate boundaries and manage expectations. Business has to move fast, but do we really want the future where we’re all tethered to Twitter?

Not even I want that.

Photo credit Deja V Maker

Related posts:

  1. How to Do More With Less Time
  2. 6 Time Management Tips: Time Audits
  3. What Storytellers Can Do In Real Time
  4. Map Your Time
  5. Third Options and Time Crunches

ChrisBrogan.com runs on the Genesis Framework

Genesis Theme Framework

The Genesis Framework empowers you to quickly and easily build incredible websites with WordPress. Whether you're a novice or advanced developer, Genesis provides you with the secure and search-engine-optimized foundation that takes WordPress to places you never thought it could go.

With automatic theme updates and world-class support included, Genesis is the smart choice for your WordPress website or blog.

Become a StudioPress Affiliate

  • http://dadspokerblog.com Dad Brogan

    Up until two years ago, I was one of those blackberry types, full access, but I was part of a two person department supporting our companies IT and web presence. Having to respond at the drop of a hat was quite a bit of pressure. Even now, after two years, it is hard to let go of those type of habits. My phone now only has text capabilities, but even that can be a distraction. I am trying hard to learn to be patient. Besides, if we just react to the current fast pace atmosphere we are going to miss out on something. Sometimes, it is nice to think before acting or would that be reacting? Good post Chris. Hope you will be able to slow down the pace yet still keep yourself where you want to be.

    Dad.

  • http://dadspokerblog.com Dad Brogan

    Up until two years ago, I was one of those blackberry types, full access, but I was part of a two person department supporting our companies IT and web presence. Having to respond at the drop of a hat was quite a bit of pressure. Even now, after two years, it is hard to let go of those type of habits. My phone now only has text capabilities, but even that can be a distraction. I am trying hard to learn to be patient. Besides, if we just react to the current fast pace atmosphere we are going to miss out on something. Sometimes, it is nice to think before acting or would that be reacting? Good post Chris. Hope you will be able to slow down the pace yet still keep yourself where you want to be.

    Dad.

  • http://www.nipsad.com scott

    One of my three words was balance. Balance is very important to me because it should touch every aspect of my life. What we are talking about here is balancing our time. Since I have had my Blackberry since 2000, my life has been very unbalanced or at least heavily focused on work. Now that I am married; it is important to decide where my time is best spent after 7pm. I am capable of turning off my Blackberry now; this was a VERY big step. I sneak a peak before bed. I try not to take my phone-Blackberry out to dinner with my wife. Remember the days before email and cell phones? Barely! I am launching an online retailer soon and I am glued to my computer in my spare time. I just need to get this project done. Is that fair to the people around me? I am not saying we need to slow down like the other posts, but we should learn to dedicate certain hours for certain activities. I don’t read as much as Chris, but I would like to. We can learn a lot by slowing down; look around you and see what’s going on. It’s not just you trying to get you work out. Do something charitable. Go to a museum. Spend time with your family. By the way…I am not able to do all of this yet, but I continue to try. Good luck everyone.

    Lastly; set expectations and no one will complain.

  • http://www.nipsad.com scott

    One of my three words was balance. Balance is very important to me because it should touch every aspect of my life. What we are talking about here is balancing our time. Since I have had my Blackberry since 2000, my life has been very unbalanced or at least heavily focused on work. Now that I am married; it is important to decide where my time is best spent after 7pm. I am capable of turning off my Blackberry now; this was a VERY big step. I sneak a peak before bed. I try not to take my phone-Blackberry out to dinner with my wife. Remember the days before email and cell phones? Barely! I am launching an online retailer soon and I am glued to my computer in my spare time. I just need to get this project done. Is that fair to the people around me? I am not saying we need to slow down like the other posts, but we should learn to dedicate certain hours for certain activities. I don’t read as much as Chris, but I would like to. We can learn a lot by slowing down; look around you and see what’s going on. It’s not just you trying to get you work out. Do something charitable. Go to a museum. Spend time with your family. By the way…I am not able to do all of this yet, but I continue to try. Good luck everyone.

    Lastly; set expectations and no one will complain.

  • http://greghuntoon.com Greg Huntoon

    This is occurring everywhere in business right now, it’s not just those of us who are constantly Twittering, emailing, texting, etc. I have been quietly complaining about this at work, where occasionally the owners promise 3-4 day turnarounds on proposals and presentations, instead of the necessary 2 – 2.5 weeks.

    Regardless of whether or not companies have unrealistic expectations, nothing will change until we stop bending to the requests. Why would you want me to work quickly and break my back to deliver you any sort of work that will be rushed, when you can get a product twice as good if you give me a couple more days?

    I want my deliveries to be complete, well-thought, and to exceed the expectations of the recipient, not just to be on time.

  • http://greghuntoon.com Greg Huntoon

    This is occurring everywhere in business right now, it’s not just those of us who are constantly Twittering, emailing, texting, etc. I have been quietly complaining about this at work, where occasionally the owners promise 3-4 day turnarounds on proposals and presentations, instead of the necessary 2 – 2.5 weeks.

    Regardless of whether or not companies have unrealistic expectations, nothing will change until we stop bending to the requests. Why would you want me to work quickly and break my back to deliver you any sort of work that will be rushed, when you can get a product twice as good if you give me a couple more days?

    I want my deliveries to be complete, well-thought, and to exceed the expectations of the recipient, not just to be on time.

  • http://www.frankthinking.com Frank Reed

    Normally, Chris, I find your stuff agreeable but not today. Did you and Seth Godin decide to both post to complain about the things you help perpetuate and make a living from?

    How you live your life is entirely up to you but it makes one curious. If you profess this idea of relationship as being the real deal and then whine about those who want timely communication about something that is important to them (part of a relationship is understanding the needs of others whether they are reasonable or not) you come off as hypocritical.

    You have helped to perpetuate a lot of what you’re complaining about. It’s not reasonable to have tens of thousands following you on Twitter then having your e-mail out there for everyone then act as if we should only respond to you and vice versa when you find it convenient and on your terms. To expect everyone else to see the world like you want them to is at best naive and worst arrogant.

    We are humans and we have limits. Today’s technology of being “on all the time” is testing those limits in ways never imagined just 20 years ago. Usually, in order to have one thing something else has to suffer. Each person has to decide what is most important to them. Complaining about what you have helped to perpetuate (whether intentionally or not) is an indication that you may need to make some decisions yourself.

    If you slowed down yourself I bet everyone would survive and you might have less expectations placed on you. Just a thought but you have to make that call rather than trying to get everyone else on board with what you deem is appropriate.

  • http://www.frankthinking.com Frank Reed

    Normally, Chris, I find your stuff agreeable but not today. Did you and Seth Godin decide to both post to complain about the things you help perpetuate and make a living from?

    How you live your life is entirely up to you but it makes one curious. If you profess this idea of relationship as being the real deal and then whine about those who want timely communication about something that is important to them (part of a relationship is understanding the needs of others whether they are reasonable or not) you come off as hypocritical.

    You have helped to perpetuate a lot of what you’re complaining about. It’s not reasonable to have tens of thousands following you on Twitter then having your e-mail out there for everyone then act as if we should only respond to you and vice versa when you find it convenient and on your terms. To expect everyone else to see the world like you want them to is at best naive and worst arrogant.

    We are humans and we have limits. Today’s technology of being “on all the time” is testing those limits in ways never imagined just 20 years ago. Usually, in order to have one thing something else has to suffer. Each person has to decide what is most important to them. Complaining about what you have helped to perpetuate (whether intentionally or not) is an indication that you may need to make some decisions yourself.

    If you slowed down yourself I bet everyone would survive and you might have less expectations placed on you. Just a thought but you have to make that call rather than trying to get everyone else on board with what you deem is appropriate.

  • http://oldbeforewise.com Sid Parham

    In the 1920′s many people refered to the telephone as an “instrument of the devil.” There are days when I concur, but I still carry my blackberry. If we want boundries, we have to extablish and keep them. But if on a Sunday I’m emailing my daughters and I see business mail, I’m hap to answer it and in doing so I train my correspondents to expect instant replies. There is no Twitter Czar to set the rules. We have decide what we want and train others to it. If we’re afraid of losing customers, we are at their mercy.

  • http://oldbeforewise.com Sid Parham

    In the 1920′s many people refered to the telephone as an “instrument of the devil.” There are days when I concur, but I still carry my blackberry. If we want boundries, we have to extablish and keep them. But if on a Sunday I’m emailing my daughters and I see business mail, I’m hap to answer it and in doing so I train my correspondents to expect instant replies. There is no Twitter Czar to set the rules. We have decide what we want and train others to it. If we’re afraid of losing customers, we are at their mercy.

  • J.T. O’Donnell

    I’ve been going back and forth on the pros and cons of actually promoting my availability – ways to take ‘setting office hours’ a step further. I wonder how people will react. Will they respect it, or will they decide they don’t appreciate my choice to unplug and choose to unplug from me? Until I can afford a full-time assistant to help me answer every inquiry for my new start-up I feel forced to stay connected. I recognize it’s choice, but I think it’s a wise one for me to make at this stage of my business.

    But as you wisely point out, it has made me much more respectful of other people’s time. I don’t expect same-day turnaround anymore, and I find people appreciate that.

  • J.T. O’Donnell

    I’ve been going back and forth on the pros and cons of actually promoting my availability – ways to take ‘setting office hours’ a step further. I wonder how people will react. Will they respect it, or will they decide they don’t appreciate my choice to unplug and choose to unplug from me? Until I can afford a full-time assistant to help me answer every inquiry for my new start-up I feel forced to stay connected. I recognize it’s choice, but I think it’s a wise one for me to make at this stage of my business.

    But as you wisely point out, it has made me much more respectful of other people’s time. I don’t expect same-day turnaround anymore, and I find people appreciate that.

  • http://www.propdata.co.za/ Robrt

    So true. I must confess that on a business level when I want something I want it now! It seems the world has reached a truly Macdonalds culture where everything is instant and disposable.

    Getting home I’m almost the opposite. While I feel somewhat isolated when the internet is down (hey, this is Africa it happens often) I don’t need to be on it 24/7 I just like the comfort of knowing that it’s there. Often I’ll let my mobile take a message rather than answer, emails I get back to in the week and I’ll wait for anything off of an a-la-carte menu.

    I think it’s a balance that we all need to find. Sadly business is ruled by those with a good turn-around time, even if at times the expense of quality…

    “Welcome to Macdonalds… would you like fries with that?”

  • http://www.propdata.co.za/ Robrt

    So true. I must confess that on a business level when I want something I want it now! It seems the world has reached a truly Macdonalds culture where everything is instant and disposable.

    Getting home I’m almost the opposite. While I feel somewhat isolated when the internet is down (hey, this is Africa it happens often) I don’t need to be on it 24/7 I just like the comfort of knowing that it’s there. Often I’ll let my mobile take a message rather than answer, emails I get back to in the week and I’ll wait for anything off of an a-la-carte menu.

    I think it’s a balance that we all need to find. Sadly business is ruled by those with a good turn-around time, even if at times the expense of quality…

    “Welcome to Macdonalds… would you like fries with that?”

  • http://www.hallicious.com Chris Hall

    I don’t think this is unique to the online world. At work, I love the people who fire off an E-mail and then cruise by my desk to ask if I got it, two seconds later… ;) Online, I am personally understanding this phenomenon with every new connection I make in my communities. I have to remember though that any stress I feel from these connections is self induced.

    The clash between the consumer’s desire for instant response and the actual “speed of business” is the catalyst for speeding things up, but the question remains, how fast is fast enough?

    -chris

  • http://www.hallicious.com Chris Hall

    I don’t think this is unique to the online world. At work, I love the people who fire off an E-mail and then cruise by my desk to ask if I got it, two seconds later… ;) Online, I am personally understanding this phenomenon with every new connection I make in my communities. I have to remember though that any stress I feel from these connections is self induced.

    The clash between the consumer’s desire for instant response and the actual “speed of business” is the catalyst for speeding things up, but the question remains, how fast is fast enough?

    -chris

  • http://www.LiveInWestMi.com Tami Vroma

    Chris – Right now for so many I think it is a matter of survival! Especially as Realtors, we have learned that the only way we are going to survive the future is by being on line! I know that I enjoy it very much when I am camping with my horses. . .I can’t afford to have the net on my Treo so I actually get a few days that the pace slows. I love it!

  • http://www.LiveInWestMi.com Tami Vroma

    Chris – Right now for so many I think it is a matter of survival! Especially as Realtors, we have learned that the only way we are going to survive the future is by being on line! I know that I enjoy it very much when I am camping with my horses. . .I can’t afford to have the net on my Treo so I actually get a few days that the pace slows. I love it!

  • http://www.projecthappilyeverafter.com Alisa Bowman

    A few years ago, a client called and emailed me about 25 times one weekend about something that was not an emergency. I did not return any of the calls or emails until Sunday night. I did try to wait until Monday morning but his last message was, “I’m really worried about you. I hope you are okay.” I called back and said, “It’s the weekend. Although I do work on the weekend and will send the occasional email on the weekend, you can’t expect that I will work. Nothing happened to me. Do not do that again.” He didn’t, and as soon as I pointed out his boundary error, he apologized. Most people understand once you point it out, and the ones who don’t probably aren’t worth doing business with, IMHO.

  • http://www.projecthappilyeverafter.com Alisa Bowman

    A few years ago, a client called and emailed me about 25 times one weekend about something that was not an emergency. I did not return any of the calls or emails until Sunday night. I did try to wait until Monday morning but his last message was, “I’m really worried about you. I hope you are okay.” I called back and said, “It’s the weekend. Although I do work on the weekend and will send the occasional email on the weekend, you can’t expect that I will work. Nothing happened to me. Do not do that again.” He didn’t, and as soon as I pointed out his boundary error, he apologized. Most people understand once you point it out, and the ones who don’t probably aren’t worth doing business with, IMHO.

  • http://www.writingroads.com/blog Julie Roads

    SO TRUE. I’m trying to reinstate ‘nighttime’ and ‘weekends’ but it’s hard when the rest of the world keeps working. To not work all weekend means a Monday morning going through 300+ emails. When we’re all playing by different rules, it gets awfully tricky…

  • http://www.writingroads.com/blog Julie Roads

    SO TRUE. I’m trying to reinstate ‘nighttime’ and ‘weekends’ but it’s hard when the rest of the world keeps working. To not work all weekend means a Monday morning going through 300+ emails. When we’re all playing by different rules, it gets awfully tricky…

  • http://www.graymatterminute.com/ usegraymatter

    Gee, must be hard to be a celebrity blogger these days.

    First, Peter Kim is all knotted up over “echoes,” and you can’t get a break from your fans.

    Why not just write a post stating your new policy or “hours of operation?”

    I’m with Frank Reed on this one.

    I know how I don’t want to spend my time online…
    I don’t want to spend it complaining.

  • http://www.graymatterminute.com usegraymatter

    Gee, must be hard to be a celebrity blogger these days.

    First, Peter Kim is all knotted up over “echoes,” and you can’t get a break from your fans.

    Why not just write a post stating your new policy or “hours of operation?”

    I’m with Frank Reed on this one.

    I know how I don’t want to spend my time online…
    I don’t want to spend it complaining.

  • http://rickmorganconsulting.com Rick Morgan

    Clearly, we (humans) not the machines and or technology need to be in control. When that fails we lose a sense of self and the result is “stress”. It is good advise to pay attention to your own “natural” rhythms and be true to them. Really, who is in charge here? :-)

  • http://rickmorganconsulting.com Rick Morgan

    Clearly, we (humans) not the machines and or technology need to be in control. When that fails we lose a sense of self and the result is “stress”. It is good advise to pay attention to your own “natural” rhythms and be true to them. Really, who is in charge here? :-)

  • http://www.sandiegodogbeach.com Jen Wilbur

    This is a constant struggle, and I’m right there with you Chris. Being married to a technophobe probably helps, but I have to unplug to stay sane. What good am I to myself or my clients if I don’t spend a little time decompressing, relaxing and reflecting? If I’m always in “plugged in” mode, I’m reacting and not thinking thinking. I manage those expectations but making sure I’m unplugged for a bit each day. Can’t take the iPhone with me in the pool. Sorry!

  • http://www.sandiegodogbeach.com Jen Wilbur

    This is a constant struggle, and I’m right there with you Chris. Being married to a technophobe probably helps, but I have to unplug to stay sane. What good am I to myself or my clients if I don’t spend a little time decompressing, relaxing and reflecting? If I’m always in “plugged in” mode, I’m reacting and not thinking thinking. I manage those expectations but making sure I’m unplugged for a bit each day. Can’t take the iPhone with me in the pool. Sorry!

  • http://www.justhardwork.blogspot.com Paul Marshall

    Good reminder for us all! It is critical that we use our time which is an ever decreasing commodity as effectively and efficiently as possible. PRIORITIZE. Your time management system should not be a FIFO or LIFO system. You have a limited time to get done everything you need to and the reality is you will rarely if ever have an inbox/to-do list that is empty….make sure you deal with the most critical, strategic, time sensitive things in priority and be thoughtful in your response. Quality of response should trump pace of response.

  • http://www.justhardwork.blogspot.com Paul Marshall

    Good reminder for us all! It is critical that we use our time which is an ever decreasing commodity as effectively and efficiently as possible. PRIORITIZE. Your time management system should not be a FIFO or LIFO system. You have a limited time to get done everything you need to and the reality is you will rarely if ever have an inbox/to-do list that is empty….make sure you deal with the most critical, strategic, time sensitive things in priority and be thoughtful in your response. Quality of response should trump pace of response.

  • http://www.ambeck.com Avil Beckford

    Chris,
    You are absolutely right and we all have to be very mindful of other people’s time and try to manage our expectations. I have started to create boundaries in my life. I have learned in life that most things can wait. Avil
    http://www.twitter.com/avilbeckford

  • http://www.ambeck.com Avil Beckford

    Chris,
    You are absolutely right and we all have to be very mindful of other people’s time and try to manage our expectations. I have started to create boundaries in my life. I have learned in life that most things can wait. Avil
    http://www.twitter.com/avilbeckford

  • http://www.ambeck.com Avil Beckford

    Chris,
    You are absolutely right and we all have to be very mindful of other people’s time and try to manage our expectations. I have started to create boundaries in my life. I have learned in life that most things can wait. Avil
    http://www.twitter.com/avilbeckford

  • http://www.sonnygill.com Sonny Gill

    I also think people conflict the ways of blogging to how all communications should be. In blogging, we’re told to be quick with replying to comments/detractors and take part in the current conversation. It’s good to connect with these folks in a reasonable amount of time but to expect the same through general correspondence is a bit much.

  • http://www.sonnygill.com Sonny Gill

    I also think people conflict the ways of blogging to how all communications should be. In blogging, we’re told to be quick with replying to comments/detractors and take part in the current conversation. It’s good to connect with these folks in a reasonable amount of time but to expect the same through general correspondence is a bit much.

  • http://www.redwirenation.com Erin Bury

    I find this to be especially when dealing with the interview process. A few years ago it was commonplace to hear nothing after an interview for weeks while other candidates were interviewed. Now, it seems that people expect a reply or a request for a follow-up interview almost immediately.

  • http://www.redwirenation.com Erin Bury

    I find this to be especially when dealing with the interview process. A few years ago it was commonplace to hear nothing after an interview for weeks while other candidates were interviewed. Now, it seems that people expect a reply or a request for a follow-up interview almost immediately.

  • http://www.sonnygill.com Sonny Gill

    I also think people conflict the ways of blogging to how all communications should be. In blogging, we’re told to be quick with replying to comments/detractors and take part in the current conversation. It’s good to connect with these folks in a reasonable amount of time but to expect the same through general correspondence is a bit much.

  • http://www.redwirenation.com Erin Bury

    I find this to be especially when dealing with the interview process. A few years ago it was commonplace to hear nothing after an interview for weeks while other candidates were interviewed. Now, it seems that people expect a reply or a request for a follow-up interview almost immediately.

  • http://www.shouldidrinkthat.com spoon

    I work with a guy who will send me an email or comment on my personal blog, then txt me, IM and call right away to see if I received it. If this was business critical I could understand since I manage a lot of IT for my company but it’s to the point of even forwards get this much attention. Some days he’ll walk up and stand at my cube waiting for me to get off the phone to see if I read his forward. This this one thing I wont miss when I’m laid off in a month. Thankfully he hasnt figured out Twitter.

  • http://www.shouldidrinkthat.com spoon

    I work with a guy who will send me an email or comment on my personal blog, then txt me, IM and call right away to see if I received it. If this was business critical I could understand since I manage a lot of IT for my company but it’s to the point of even forwards get this much attention. Some days he’ll walk up and stand at my cube waiting for me to get off the phone to see if I read his forward. This this one thing I wont miss when I’m laid off in a month. Thankfully he hasnt figured out Twitter.

  • http://www.shouldidrinkthat.com spoon

    I work with a guy who will send me an email or comment on my personal blog, then txt me, IM and call right away to see if I received it. If this was business critical I could understand since I manage a lot of IT for my company but it’s to the point of even forwards get this much attention. Some days he’ll walk up and stand at my cube waiting for me to get off the phone to see if I read his forward. This this one thing I wont miss when I’m laid off in a month. Thankfully he hasnt figured out Twitter.

  • http://blogbuildingu.com Hendry Lee

    That reminds me of a friend who got a $14 e-book purchase. He demanded almost instant support and asked for a refund when his question wasn’t answered in an hour.

    “It’s not about what you are doing that matter, but what you choose not to do.”

    People should stop trying to squeeze more out of their time. For instance, when I receive an invitation to the new micro blogging platform, I never accept it. Perhaps just for a quick review and no more.

    But I still feel overwhelmed on a regular basis…

  • http://blogbuildingu.com Hendry Lee

    That reminds me of a friend who got a $14 e-book purchase. He demanded almost instant support and asked for a refund when his question wasn’t answered in an hour.

    “It’s not about what you are doing that matter, but what you choose not to do.”

    People should stop trying to squeeze more out of their time. For instance, when I receive an invitation to the new micro blogging platform, I never accept it. Perhaps just for a quick review and no more.

    But I still feel overwhelmed on a regular basis…

  • http://blogbuildingu.com Hendry Lee

    That reminds me of a friend who got a $14 e-book purchase. He demanded almost instant support and asked for a refund when his question wasn’t answered in an hour.

    “It’s not about what you are doing that matter, but what you choose not to do.”

    People should stop trying to squeeze more out of their time. For instance, when I receive an invitation to the new micro blogging platform, I never accept it. Perhaps just for a quick review and no more.

    But I still feel overwhelmed on a regular basis…

  • http://chinnathambi.com Venky Chinnathambi

    Agreed, this is a huge problem. People start to panic or upset if they don’t get a reply in few hours. The on-line tools (such as twitter, facebook, etc) are really useful to build and maintain a community, and like anything else they can also rob your personal life if not careful – there is no need to constantly tweet or update facebook.

  • http://chinnathambi.com Venky Chinnathambi

    Agreed, this is a huge problem. People start to panic or upset if they don’t get a reply in few hours. The on-line tools (such as twitter, facebook, etc) are really useful to build and maintain a community, and like anything else they can also rob your personal life if not careful – there is no need to constantly tweet or update facebook.

  • http://chinnathambi.com Venky Chinnathambi

    Agreed, this is a huge problem. People start to panic or upset if they don’t get a reply in few hours. The on-line tools (such as twitter, facebook, etc) are really useful to build and maintain a community, and like anything else they can also rob your personal life if not careful – there is no need to constantly tweet or update facebook.

  • http://www.womenspathways.com Pixie Stevenson

    We do teach people how to treat us. Expectations have changed in the digital world. When enough people realize that life isn’t an emergency, things will change.

  • http://www.womenspathways.com Pixie Stevenson

    We do teach people how to treat us. Expectations have changed in the digital world. When enough people realize that life isn’t an emergency, things will change.