Stop Talking About Yourself

Chris

Not so sure what you mean here about blog posts. If we write a post and link previous articles in support of the new article is that talking about ourselves?

Twitter – more about others than me. I like to tweet articles Iike and talk about the success of others as it makes me happy watching friends excel. Could be the mom in me as when Andrew does something it is never about how he was taught, it is that HE did it.

Anyway, would love to hear more on the blog part …

The point is that if you're writing about yourself, your events, your stuff, your material only, then you're missing some opportunities. You write about other people, your reactions of things, etc.

Hi Chris, thanks for this blog post – food for thought. My blog is not about myself, but I'm realising that since starting a blog my social media interaction ratio has shifted somewhat into promoting it, whereas before it was mostly focused on promoting other people's stuff. I thought that since my blog is relatively new it could do with all the promotion it could get, but having read your blog post I'm realising that I need to go back to my original ratio, especially on Facebook and Twitter. Will definitely take action on that asap, many thanks for your advice.

Chris –

This is so true. I'm not sure if you saw this study by a few Rutgers' profs (props to NJ!), but it's a pretty neat read:

http://news.rutgers.edu/medrel/news-releases/20…

Those that practice altruism are more influential than the narcissists.

I'm actually thinking of writing about myself exclusively in the third person… :)

While I fully understand your point, I have to disagree with you.

I personally miss the way blogging use to be when people shared stories of their lives, families and what was going on in their daily lives. I MISS that.

While I get that many people write blogs more for people to read then for themselves now that is never the approach I've taken. My blog has always been about anything that is on my mind and that includes what is going on in my life. I like that approach and wished more did.

I still love all the great content I get to read from friends, but I also miss them sharing what is going on in their lives as well. I don't need a pitch, but I do want a peak into their lives.

I think yes and no? One thing that my readers tell me is that they come to my blog because I don't just write up some strategies and let them figure it out, I also add my own experiences, both positive and negative. They pefer the personal aspect and like that I've actually experienced what I talk about and go through many of the same things they do.

I agree that we don't need to be spammy about what we do, but I feel that personal anecdotes and a more human point of view add unique perspectives to blogs.

I'm with you on Twitter – but I think the blog issue depends. For instance – with Brian Clark it makes perfect sense that he doesn't talk about himself because that's the brand. But with someone like Dooce or The Pioneer Woman – it's the stories about themselves that people tune in for. Is the difference corporate blog versus ??? blog? Maybe. (Male vs. Female? I don't think so, but I'll have to look into that one.) But I know that my most popular posts on my blog are when I tell a story about myself and people can relate and love knowing that it's not just them. They relish in the human sharing…

I was going to say pretty much the same thing as C.C., so I'll just add a +1 here instead.
I want to hear about the person behind the tweet, and as I get to know that person I become interested in what they are doing. Redirecting me to other people isn't nearly as interesting. Of course, constant self-promotion is just as boring. Just be human.

My blog is mostly about others – I probably have some posts in there talking about me, but mostly I'm talking about subjects or other sites/people.

Twitter is much worse. Most of my posts (but fortunately not all) are about my blog (a.k.a. myself). Now that you point this out, I'm going to be revisiting my Twitter strategy.

Hadn't really thought about this before – thanks!

Okay, right. I should have pre-qualified (I often do) by saying that there are plenty of great personalized blogs where the person is every bit as important as the payload (yours, for instance).

I guess I meant from the business point of view. I want BestBuy to talk about me, not themselves. : )

Agreed. While you're actually shooting 2:10 ;) I preach the 90-10 rule in that you should be talking about yourself (or your brand) only 10% of the time, and you should talk about others or your industry the other 90%.

I think when done wrong, this is what prevents brands from being followed. It's better to elevate the discussion rather than yourself.

I agree with your post and a lot of the comments here, Chris. I think the subtle difference is the intent. If the intent is to promote (service, product, persona, whatever) then trust is earned (more effectively, anyways) with a ratio you prescribe. If the intent is to just share experiences, like some have alluded to, then it doesn't quite matter if those experiences are personal or not, right? In fact it does often characterize posts to make them more personal and real at times, but if the intent is to promote it can come off as smarmy, for lack of a better word..

I think you need to be clearer. For the “dummies” in the audience.

How do you mean talking about you? Aren't most blog posts/tweets opinions? Your opinion? Do you mean we need to reword everything to delete the word “I”? Might be cute… or annoying… to delete the word “I”, but I don't think you mean that. So how do you mean? Be less personal? Why? Don't talk about your own experiences? But that's all I know.

Or do yo simply mean stop promoting yourself? (I'm not selling anything, yet). Stop boasting and skite-ing?

Or something else?

Funny, try an analysis on this post.

Can't say I entirely agree with the “Stop Talking About Your Feelings”. When I feel strongly about something and I tweet it out I get pretty good engagement on twitter. I say it in the first place to engage people that agree with me or disagree with me. Those are the best conversations and my whole point for being there.

Well crap. Then I'm even worse at it than I think. Thanks. : )

I agree to a point. My wife and I each write on the same blog which is a family blog with a review aspect. We talk about our family a goot bit but we do also speak about others. In regards to my tweets. I spend a good amount of time daily retweeting others and not pushing my stuff. Thanks for the great advise.

It's one thing to be so fascinated with ourselves, our lives or our businesses that we prattle on about nothing else, but the other extreme is no better. If all of our posts, tweets or whatever are merely promoting someone or something else, where's the real value in that.

A third option is to have something of value to say. Some people seem to be able to post nearly every day and still come up with some fresh angle, even if it's the same point they've made several times before. But most “selfless” bloggers, seem to have nothing to say but “look what I found”. It just plays into the mainstream media argument that bloggers are nothing but content leaches, creating nothing of their own.

If people have nothing of value to add to the conversation, maybe they shouldn't post at all.

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I reread this comment and realize, I'm talking about myself again.

Here's one for you: Do find that talking to yourself, as I just did above, helps you figure stuff out? Or does it just lock in a bad habit?

Peter Shankman, Mr. Mirror, Mirror, on the wall….

thanks for the This is a golden advice

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