chrisbrogan.com» emotions http://www.chrisbrogan.com Learn How Human Business Works - Beyond Social Media Mon, 06 Feb 2012 09:30:05 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 Emotions at a Distance http://www.chrisbrogan.com/emotions-at-a-distance/ http://www.chrisbrogan.com/emotions-at-a-distance/#comments Sun, 03 Jan 2010 16:31:16 +0000 ceb http://www.chrisbrogan.com/?p=4815 I left the following comment on a blog post:

You know that horrible thing where we say “there are two kinds of people?” Well, here’s one of those:

There are two kinds of people: those who see the computer/internet/buttons as being attached to human, feeling beings, and those who think it’s just online and that it doesn’t attach.

That’s like saying the phone is just something to talk into and there’s no emotions there, either.

It’s not just online. People do have feelings that they associate to these “at a distance” places.

Yes, people overreact. We agree there. But to dismiss emotions simply because of the medium would be to dismiss letters, telephones, pictures, etc. Lots of things happen at a distance and yet convey consequences.

I think there are most definitely two sets of minds at work, and that by realizing the above, it describes/defines a lot of those times when one side or the other feels misunderstood. Just remembering this one detail, and realizing which of the two people you’re dealing with, and things might get better.

]]> http://www.chrisbrogan.com/emotions-at-a-distance/feed/ 44 Playing the Emotional High Ground http://www.chrisbrogan.com/playing-the-emotional-high-ground/ http://www.chrisbrogan.com/playing-the-emotional-high-ground/#comments Sat, 17 Oct 2009 15:47:31 +0000 ceb http://www.chrisbrogan.com/?p=4494 Andy Bloch and Chris Brogan

The guy in the photo is professional poker player Andy Bloch. I met him last night at Annie Duke’s charity poker event last night in Las Vegas, and by “met,” we played in the event against each other. He would have crushed me, but my new friend Hal Lublin kicked my butt before Andy got the chance. What I learned about Andy within five minutes of meeting him was that he was a real stand-up guy.

He staked a guy at our table who washed out really quick so that the guy wouldn’t have to go run and get more money to stay in the game. It wasn’t a lot of money, and Andy was there to support charity, but none of that matters. The guy had lost, was feeling bad, and Andy saw it and kept him in the game. With that one move, he became a champion to me.

You have a chance like this every day. In the use of these tools, at a distance, we sometimes forget that people on the other side of the glass have emotions. We say snarky, angry, dismissive things. We see a moment like what Andy saw and we crush the opportunity instead of holding out a hand to keep someone afloat.

One thing that will separate those who make these tools work to do human business, the trust agents among us, is that we’re going to be more like Andy Bloch and recognize opportunities to play the emotional high ground.

It’s your choice.

]]> http://www.chrisbrogan.com/playing-the-emotional-high-ground/feed/ 44 How the Seasonal Blues Work http://www.chrisbrogan.com/how-the-seasonal-blues-work/ http://www.chrisbrogan.com/how-the-seasonal-blues-work/#comments Tue, 09 Dec 2008 23:37:22 +0000 ceb http://www.chrisbrogan.com/?p=2982 Blue Every year I get the blues from around Thanksgiving until January 2nd. It’s just as normal to me as saying “Hey, there’s a rainstorm outside.” It’s not really much more than something I contend with.

It’s nothing external, really. It’s a set of thoughts that trigger some kind of experience inside, that triggers some kind of overall feeling that I associate with this time of year. It just happens. I deal with it. And then the next year is here. Truth is, I need this feeling, every bit as much as I need other feelings.

Why? Because it makes me work harder. It makes me think deeper. It makes me try to be a better person. Everything about this time of year is as important to the person you think I am as the smiles and the good will and all the power and passion I bring to things.

Don’t ask me to cheer up. Don’t tell me all the great things going on in my life. Don’t ask me to snap out of it. It’s not for you to fix. No one. It’s just the weather in my head.

LOTS of people go through this in their own way. The only difference is that they don’t have 25,000 friends on Twitter, and they don’t have a passionate stage from which they broadcast everything every day. They usually just deal with it quietly and hope no one notices.

I love you and I love the world and I love what we all have going for us. I’m going to sail the fastest, most powerful pirate ship in the waters in 2009, and I’m going to help as many of you as possible to be captains of your own ships, too.

You’re all the best. I’m okay. Thank you.

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