July 9, 2009 69 Comments

The Secret Fight Club

Steve Wright from Jay Peak One of my top three movies of all times is Fight Club. I’ve seen it seventeen times as of July 2009. I’m fascinated with lots of different things in the movie (and I loved the book very much – read it before I saw the movie). My current favorite part reminds me a lot of what’s going on these days.

My favorite part is when Brad Pitt and Edward Norton start shifting from just fighting into putting together a nationwide (international?) presence. Wherever you see a black eye or a missing tooth, it’s someone involved with Fight Club, and they all treat each other a little more special than they do the general public, because they’re in something together. It’s a movement of sorts, and that’s what author Chuck Palahniuk was exploring at some parts: how group activities for men have changed (evaporated!) in more recent years.

Here’s the thing: in some ways, what we’ve got going with social media feels like that secret club. It feels like we’re part of something.

The guy in the picture is Steve Wright, VP of marketing (or something like that) up at Jay Peak Resort in Vermont. When he caught some of my tweets that I was in the area, he dropped me a line and said I should swing by for a ride on their tram, and a little lunch.

Steve was so friendly, and so kind, and the ride in the tram (up 4000-ish feet into the heavy clouds hugging the mountain) was a blast. Lunch was very kid-friendly (important to parents on the road), and it was just a fun, unplanned adventure.

The Secret Fight Club

Basketball professional and businessman Shaquille O’Neal ( @the_real_shaq on Twitter) tweeted this message out famously many months back: “To all twitterers , if u c me n public come say hi, we r not the same we r from twitteronia, we connect.” Other celebrities like MC Hammer are so real that when you finally meet and spend time with them (I’ve hung out briefly at TechCrunch40 and also at CES in Vegas), they’re just as human as anyone else.

Podcasters and bloggers regularly reach out and do great things for each other. They share expenses to attend conferences. My friend, Zane Aveton famously tweeted her way into a ride and lodging to attend SXSW this past March.

This is really astounding, if you think about it, the amount of good will that we pass around in this space. And it’s not relegated to “big names,” whatever that means any more. It’s everyone. People DO things for each other in this space. They give first and give often.

(That last part is the secret sauce: fail to give and you’ll find yourself in a karmic imbalance that usually corrects itself quite obviously.)

I, for one, am always excited about it. I love contributing in my own special ways to the secret fight club. I love giving to causes, helping raise for other causes, and finding ways to get more and more people into jobs that build this space up.

Are You Part of the Secret Fight Club?

Think about it. Are you giving to the secret fight club? Are you building small powerful networks? Are you helping others find work, or sharing whatever your professional cool offering is? Are you the Adam Wallace or Brian Simpson of your organization, offering a plate of free bacon at the bar?

It’s SO easy, so rewarding, and a hell of a lot of fun. Join in.

What’s your contribution?

The Secret Bonus Round

(I added this in after the first push of the post, so folks who only get one RSS copy might not even SEE this.)

What if YOU started something that identifies you as part of the SFC? What if YOU figured out a way to pass around the symbol, such that others knew you were contributing? Maybe it doesn’t have to be as explicit, but then again, wouldn’t a secret signal, sign, symbol, whatever, be cool?

Blog some ideas, and let’s pass this “secretfightclub” tag and idea around a bit. Cool?

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  • http://www.deirdrebreakenridge.com/ Deirdre

    Thanks! I gave my colleague three different publishing options and she walked away with one at the top of her list. She couldn't wait to get off the phone to pursue this new direction and her writing goals :)

  • http://twitter.com/TMarieHilton TMarieHilton

    Posts like this (along with the fact that I find your tweets entertaining and that we both originally hail from Maine) are the reason I enjoy following you so much Mr. Brogan.

  • http://journal.marisaduma.net Marisa Duma

    Quotations from “Fight Club”, 1999
    Novel by Chuck Palahniuk
    Screenplay by Jim Uhls
    Directed by David Fincher

    When you have insomnia, you're never really asleep, and you're never really awake.

    The things you own end up owning you. It's only after you lose everything that you're free to do anything.

    Fuck Martha Stewart. Martha's polishing the brass on the Titanic; it's all going down, man.

    I say never be complete. I say stop being perfect. I say let's evolve. Let the chips fall where they may.

    How much can you know about yourself if you've never been in a fight?

    Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy shit we don't need.

    We're the middle children of history… no purpose or place. We have no Great War, no Great Depression. Our great war is a spiritual war. Our great depression is our lives.

    You're not your job. You're not how much money you have in the bank. You're not the car you drive. You're not the contents of your wallet. You're not your fucking khakis. You're the all-singing, all-dancing crap of the world.

    No fear. No distractions. The ability to let that which does not matter truly slide.

  • http://twitter.com/startabuzz Honeybee Consulting

    OK, OK! I'll be sure not to tell ANYONE. ;) Question, though. When does “Secret Fight Club” become “Secret Project Mayhem”?

  • http://blog.uprinting.com/ UPrinting

    I don't really use Twitter. I like the idea of a “secret fight club.” But I don't want my cause to be limited just on the internet. I prefer personal interaction, just like what Shaq suggests.

  • http://mattwilson.tv MattWilsontv

    So, i just RT'd that thing from shaq even though it was really old–it got me thinking–is anyone making false RTs? Someone saying: RT @chrisBrogan i'm a big dummy and false quoting other people.

    Kinda scary (and childish)

    Of course–you are only as successful as your critics think you aren't. So if people are misquoting you–awesome–you're important.

  • danielendy

    Chris:

    I love that movie too. It was the movie that made me into a huge Ed Norton fan. He's so good.

    Social Media has changed the paradigm of the web. The first wave was just linked info. The second wave was utility like finding a store or buying a product. The third was rating and commenting. The fourth wave is allowing everyone to connect and create community. Each has exponentially greater value.

    I saw it coming and that's why I started my first company doing web work in 1995. When LinkedIn came out I hoped it would become what it is. I am a born connector and I love to help and share.

    Twitter is the start of the fifth wave – Realtime public conversations and news.

    The revenue model is still not clear for social media consultants (our black eyes and missing teeth) but the value IS clear.

    I see you as the Brad Pitt of the SMFC. Who is your alter-ego then?

    @DanielEndy
    http://Twitter.com/DanielEndy
    http://www.Acognita.com

  • Duff_McDuffee

    I think social media as you describe it is more of a #secretloveclub as it lacks the nihilistic, violent cult leader with multiple personality disorder, and has a lot more community and free sharing of ideas. In fact, this kind of connecting through social media might even address some of the meaninglessness and alienation that “Jack” experiences (which drive his obsession with joining self-help groups under false pretense) by providing real, meaningful connection beyond vapid consumerism, and a true sense of community based on values and free sharing of information.

    Love is great. Keep on spreading it. #secretloveclubwhichisnotsosecretanymore

  • http://zaneology.me zaneology

    All hail to SFC..and KFC while we praising acronyms for that matter….Now I'm hungry.

    Ahhh yes… the SXSW Adventure I affectionately call “Twitter Trust. ” From the moment @MackCollier suggested I attend SXSW (I was a Twitter Newbie at 3 Months Gestation), I saw firsthand what a difference a TWEET can make…AND how awesome this community is. After sending out a “SXSW 4 Pt. Wish List” on Twitter, @katebuckjr immediately offered to not only host me, but to also “hang out with me” (wish item 3 & 4) and @StevenRay offered to drive me (wish item 2) – I had not met either of them “IRL” – we just followed each other on Twitter…and when @StevenRay got stuck on a project delaying his departure 24 hours, I “tweet inquired” if there might be anyone else looking to rideshare to Austin earlier. A Direct Message arrived in minutes from @TexasZman recommending I connect with @CouchSurfingOri who immediately punched my home address into his GPS and picked me up on his way through Dallas….no questions asked (like…ummm How many bags DO you have?)

    And…to make this story even more Twitter Sweet, when my ride home fell through, also because of work commitments, a simple tweet of “HELP! I need a ride home to Dallas” was sent and RT’d around the Twitterverse. In less than 3 hours, @Elysa casually replies, “I can give you a ride to Dallas.” Cool thing here was – Not only had we never met in real life, we had also never tweeted before – she had just started to follow me the week prior to SXSW because one of her Twitter Friends had mentioned my Wish List to her.

    Honorable mention goes to @orchid8. I crashed at her house one night when I got separated from my crew and our only previous interaction was a Twitter introduction by @aronado suggesting we meet up at SXSW…I not only met her as hoped, but her awesome red sofa too. Then we have the @100interviews at SXSW crew – @doverbey, @morganb, @andykaufman & @sukjhit – when they asked me to be one of their 100-interviews, I asked them if they needed any help with their very aggressive project and… they let me help. How awesome is that? And…OH, how I loved the Bloggers Lounge…

    So, how is it that we have all never met before “in real life” but we treat each other “as if” – then when we do meet IRL, it’s like we already know each other and nothing feels odd or uncomfortable? Because the Twitter world is different. I am enamored by this “I’m here…and you’re there..and we’re in the Social NOW community…it's comforting. Twitter is comforting…I can read your tweets, click on your links, look at pictures of your cat and “know you” and we may never even meet or talk in person…but when we do, it’s like running into an old friend. If there is anyone that does not feel that that Twitter is a community, I encourage them to just scroll through all the smiling/non smiling/now green avatars in their stream and take note of all the faces & names they “recognize.” I bet if quizzed, they would be “more familiar” and know MORE about those folks in their Twitter Stream then their neighbor who lives down the street. Goosebumps!

    We grow up, someone tells us to be independent, we don't really need others….but we do, we really do. Power to the SFC!

    Thanks for the great post my friend, Chris Brogan and for reminding me of that fun story.

    Note to any OCD readers of this comment: Wish Item 1 was: Husband to smile and say “YES, Zane, take off and Go!” The acquisition of 2 – 4 made 1 a sure thing.

  • http://twitter.com/ThriveAMERICA Brent

    Great post!

    I am new to twitter… well I guess we all are so I found this really insightful.

  • DaveMurr

    I think I am part of a Secret Fight Club. Its called South East Michigan, or the Detroit Metro Area. There are many of us here working incredibly hard under the false pretense that we are only a blue color/automotive region. Connecting and discovering the innovators, entrepreneurs and the visionaries, we are rebuilding the area. !st rule, we do talk about. 2nd rule, we talk about it even more, because we are tired of just hanging out in basements.

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  • http://twitter.com/lynbat Linda Bateman

    Read the post. Read all the comments up to this one…

    One things reads very true: Social Media so called “experts” have forgotten the point behind creating a social network, which is the people factor. Whoever it was that said the secret is knowing WHY we create our networks (to help people) had it all right.

    I have read a thousand blogs about how we can monetize social media, but sadly, very few like this one that points out, in its not so subtle way, that social networking is our tool to bring some sort of change to the world. We can, through the power of technology, touch someone on the other side of the world and change their perspective as they change ours. We can use our knowledge to bring resolution to problems that can change the lives of others.

    Or we can use it to try and sell 2 for 1 nights at the nearest Holiday Inn and a free sample of Viagra.

    Your choice. I am opting for life changing.

  • lindabateman

    Read the post. Read all the comments up to this one…

    One things reads very true: Social Media so called “experts” have forgotten the point behind creating a social network, which is the people factor. Whoever it was that said the secret is knowing WHY we create our networks (to help people) had it all right.

    I have read a thousand blogs about how we can monetize social media, but sadly, very few like this one that points out, in its not so subtle way, that social networking is our tool to bring some sort of change to the world. We can, through the power of technology, touch someone on the other side of the world and change their perspective as they change ours. We can use our knowledge to bring resolution to problems that can change the lives of others.

    Or we can use it to try and sell 2 for 1 nights at the nearest Holiday Inn and a free sample of Viagra.

    Your choice. I am opting for life changing.

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  • http://ragga-jungle.com/index.php?showuser=11760 Tuncquick

    As a Newbie, I am always searching online for articles that can help me. Thank you

  • wwaldren

    Fantastic post Chris!
    And amazing comments too.

    I have always had a passion for community and connecting people in this increasingly disconnected world. 20 years ago (long before social networking) I opened a coffeehouse in Orlando, Fl. I remember instinctually telling my staff on our first day of business that “it is not about the coffee” I wanted them to understand the importance of the “place” that I had created and they were about to become stewards of. I wanted to make sure that they understood how we were about to open the doors to this huge community of people who had never meet each other… until we created a place for them to gather. I love comment above that references the image of a “Tribe” Shortly after opening we all felt like we were part of a secret place that eventually even developed it's own subtle culture, language, and rituals.

    Social media appears to have done the same thing in the virtual world with its effects spilling over into the physical realm. It is truly amazing to see how people connect with new friends, colleagues, mentors, and business through social media.

    I will be opening a new business in a few months where we will push the limits of nurturing the ability for strangers to connect in a new physical and social media environment. To build a new “Tribe”. My dream would be to once again profoundly affect people by providing places throughout the country where anyone including isolated or disconnected people, can easily meet others and develop new relationships.

    I sold the coffeehouse business 10 years ago…. and shortly after that, it closed. To this day, eventhough I live thousands of miles away, I stumble on conversations online and off where people talk about what a profound affect my businesses had on their life and who they connected with and how there is an emptiness now that it is gone.

    This has fueled my passion to start UNION!

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