The Truth About Star Wars and the Matrix

I can't believe this was ever up for debate?

Who could have believed anything else.

There are numerous attempts to replicate greatness in these fictional characters, but genuine genius can't be just knocked up . . .

I like David Carradine defence of Superman as the best superhero in Kill Bill. At the end of the day, Superman wakes everyday and has to put on a costume to become Clark Kent, all other superheroes do it the other way around.

Almost agree:
1.) 3 Batman movies (Keaton and Nicholson count, though tempted to say Keaton's second one counts too. DeVito as the Penguin and the hottest Catwoman since Julie Newmar? C'mon!)

2. There are only 2 Superman movies (Christopher Reeve's first and second movies. Kneel before Zod if you disagree!)

3.) You are totally screwed on the Bond thing. Never seen so many divisions of opinions as there are on THAT topic.

You're right about Superman. Richard Pryor? Please. Dolph Lundgren?

I don't really care about the Spider-Man movies. They were good, but you know...

You might be right about the Batman Movies. I could be swayed.

You have to add Cristopher Walken was also there with Keaton, DeVito and Pfeiffer. I agree so far. I read somewhere they're going to make another Batman movie with Bale and a Superman and Batman movie with Bale and Routh.

Hope we can add those as well to the "real" ones.

I agree with star wars, but will start the disagreement with the Matrix. There were 2 movies, but only one full movie. The other two movies only had good parts that might total a whole movie.

The first batman, with Nicholson, definitely works and cannot be ignored. For Bond, there are a ton of movies but really there are only 4 Bond men, Connery, Moore, Brosnan and Craig. Disappointingly, Moore did have some real stinkers.

And what about Rocky? Were there any after the first 2 or 3?

What about David Niven in the original Casino Royale? A classic surely with so many good scenes to remember . . .

Thank God.

Was worried there.

Seriously. The Matrix sequels lost me at the sweaty cave rave...

Brilliant! I could not agree more.

Wow, Chris. I think you might be The One.

Was there a question about that?

There was very little doubt, but this post was your freezing bullets in mid air moment...

But then you made amendments, and they're like sequels, diluting the original offering. Should these amendments be acknowledged, or should only the first bits be accepted as the real deal? Oh, this could get messy.

You're right on Star Wars and Matrix. Indy too. But to ignore Keaton at Batman?
Have you smashed your head or something?!

But, who was the best CatWoman?

Now that's a tough one. Because the obvious answer is that there was only one, but then someone will throw the race card at me.

Apparently that Megan Fox lady from Transformers is up for being the next Catwoman in Bale's next Batman. This has me seriously worried that we will have to delete what might otherwise be a 3rd great Batman film from our memories...

Wow, that sounds like the 1st Christian Bale movie that I would have to hate.

Julie Newmar or Eartha Kitt? I think it's closer than you think

They all were hot in their own rights.

You sir, are correctly. Very few get it right so often.

The second matrix felt like it was written by a college freshman who slept through half of his philosophy 101 class.

True, "Batman and Robin" doesn't count as a Batman movie. It should, however, count as a MST3K movie - I saw it in a theater with a couple of friends and we gave it the MST3K treatment. It was the funniest movie experience I've ever had.

The Last Crusade was my favorite Indiana Jones movie, it's damn near perfect. How dare you sir...how DARE you?!

: ) . You have a point.

I'm confused... on what planet were there more than three Star Wars movies and one Matrix? Oh yeah... bizarro-world filled with senile movie producers and philosophy hobbyists.

Okay, I'm probably the only Star Wars fan on earth who actually liked all three prequels. I'm not saying Jar Jar was a good idea. Just that I found them all to be entertaining.

Then again, that may just be my inner Star Trek fan trying to start crap among the Jedi fans...

Episode III is a great object lesson about the consequences of bad choices. Still not as good as Empire, in my book.

Aha!!!! You're definitely infiltrating. Is that what you're saying?

I agree, the prequels were entertaining enough. Sorry for comparing apples to figs.. but Jar Jar had about as much value as the character Skin in the Marvel comics.

James Bond? C'mon Chris, except for the last two, they all were "real" James Bond movies. Ergo 20 of them

See, I like Connery, but I also really liked the Daniel Craig ones. Roger Moore? Not so much. But that's me. I think there's a lot of debate in that one.

Daniel Craig is the first (and hopefully the last) to portray a "hillbilly" macho type of James Bond. In my opinion he totally ruins the original character.

Not talking about the actor though, he's quite good.

Connery Vs. Moore? My head says From Russia With Love but my heart says The Spy Who Loved Me.

In my book Sean Connery was the most stylish James Bond. He has a certain British charm yet with a slight touch of rudeness.

I have to disagree. In my opinion the only two actors who were believable in that role were/are Timothy Dalton and Daniel Craig.

Bond is a spy, who kills people, he's not a millionaire playboy good guy/loveable scamp. I love Connery, in almost every role he ever played except for James Bond (and the 2nd Highlander movie, good god that was awful).

Craid and Dalton are the only Bond I've ever looked at and said, "yeah, he could break someone's neck if he had to". The Craig movie's, in my humble opinion are the best Bond movie's to date.

Let the purist tirades ensue.

Timothy Dalton?? C'mon! The Bond series almost tanked because of him. He was as bad as a a liver cancer...

Did you guys actually read the books? I think Daniel Craig hit it right on the money.

Martin,

We were talking about the movies here and the James Bond character depicted in the movies. If it were to be a discussion regarding the book I would've had a different opinion.

I think Daniel Craig definitely makes a more believable spy. C'mon can you see Roger Moore actually surviving the torture that Craig takes. Brutal. However, Craig does lack that suave, gentleman-ly thing

Agree with you on the "Bond issue" -- Connery is THE James Bond, but Daniel Craig is rocking it "Batman Begins" style.

I'm going through the entire movie series and am reading the original Ian Fleming works. I've enjoyed them all. Hope they can keep the franchise going.

This whole Bond thing needs a female perspective. If you're going Playboy Bond, then Sean Connery's your man. I'm sorry, but Roger Moore is a cheesy candyass (though I, too, have a freakish soft spot for "The Spy Who Loved Me", but that likely has more to do with the cooler-than-cool underwater city and Curt Jurgens' badass accent). IF, however, you're going for REAL Bond, and I mean Bond in the way that Ian Fleming -- you know ... the guy who created the character? -- intended, then Daniel Craig is THE MAN. He's not all caught up in candlelight and Cheez Whiz-laden double entendres. He's all about kicking ass. And he's hot, so there's that. :)

Startabuzz you hit the nail on the head.

AMEN sister.

I can't agree more.

Have there been any Spiderman movies?

That's a good question, actually. I had heard once a while back that they were going to try to make a Spiderman movie... don't think it ever happened, though.

The Matrix sequels are the perfect example of 'don't take 6 hours to tell a 2 hour story'. I like the defense of the dock and the big aerial fight at the end (makes me want to see the Wachowskis do a Superman flick - heavily informed by what they did with Speed Racer, mind you), but the build up to them was completely empty.

Also, Batman Returns has Christopher Walken in it. That has go earn it some points.

I completely agree. I do the same thing with Oasis (They stopped making music after 'What's the Story, Morning Glory" came out), X-Men Movies (There were 2. Only 2.) and a million other things.

Proposed Ammendment:

One Bale Batman movie, one Keaton Batman Movie, and one Ledger Joker Movie. the 'Batman' element of Dark Knight was so terribly/laughably monster truck performed, I've tried to block every scene Bale is in out of my memory.

Seriously, it's like he and Nolan never even watched Batman Begins.

"There is no spoon"

we've had beers together. you know there IS a spoon

Best reply ever. : )

There is only one Terminator movie. Unless someone from the future goes back and can make a terminator come out of the floor or a hot terminatrix that can run DNA tests with her tongue.

There is one movie with a guy called John Rambo in it called First Blood. There were two Rocky movies, the one where Creed beats Rocky and the one where Rocky beats Creed.
Years ago, Hollywood made great one-off comedies like Police Academy, Smokey and the Bandit, Arthur and Airplane. Thank goodness no one ever tried to redo Spielberg classics like Jaws or Jurassic Park.
On the other hand, Robert Zemeckis made three very fine Back to the Future movies.
Finally if you're worried about Keanu's ability to handle a sequel after The Matrix and Speed, you only have to look at the best movie sequel, like, ever - Bill and Ted's Bogus Journey. Can I hear it for Wyld Stallyns anybody?

Robert Zemeckis made ONE find Back to the Future movie. The other two were clearly the result of some horrible dare or lost bet (Did you see that movie? I bet that if you bought a ticket to that movie, you got a free bowl of soup!)

Breakin the who cares rule today?

3 Star Wars, 3 Indy, 1 Matrix, 3 Batman (original, both Nolan flicks). Craig is a great Bond and there have been 2 Spiderman movies and 2 Superman movies.

That is all.

Chris Brogan wants to start a fight, apparently. ;-P

There'd probably be 4 Star Wars movies if it wasn't for the Younglings.

On a similar note, there's 2 Godfather movies, 1 Back to the Future movie and 1 Jurassic Park movie. We're still waiting for a Spider-Man movie (say, wasn't James Cameron meant to be making one?).

Still, it's not all doom and gloom. Thankfully, there are 3 Lord of the Rings movies.

It's funny, as I think the movies you are talking about are the ones in the series that have A LOT more meaning in them then the others.
Star Wars - Taoism philosophies
Martrix - Quantum Physics
Perhaps that is why they appeal to you more? Just a thought. That is what was appealing to me in them anyway.

I'm pretty sure that there are only four season of Babylon 5 — and somehow the Star Trek movies skipped a couple of numbers when naming movies. These things happen.

Heh... completely agree with you on the "only 4 seasons of B5". Season 5 was an amazing distortion of the entire story arc.

Chris, I have been laughing hysterically reading through all these reactions. It's so funny all the different perspectives we have - and the passion we have for those perspectives.

(And for the record, I agree with you on the Star Wars and Matrix comments.)

Actually Chris, it's more like 2 1/2 STAR WARS movies. ROTJ loses me after they rescue Han.

You know what I miss? The days when you made a really great movie and moved on. Like BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE CHINA :)

Which nearly had a sequel. There's a script floating around if you're brave.

I have to disagree on the Star Wars point. I think the problem is that many of us were kids when the first three came out and adults when the second three came out. We forgot what it was like to see these movies as a kid.

I went to all three prequels during matinees and watched them with a theater full of kids and they were amazing. The kids ate them up just like I did when I was a kid. Those three prequels were just as magical to the new generation of Star Wars fans as the originals were to us.

I am a teacher and the students I teach would say the exact opposite of the sentiment here: they would agree there were only three Star Wars movies, but they would suggest the prequels are the only good ones and ask when the originals were going to be remade "better". (Alright, some of my students admit that Empire kicks butt, so maybe four movies)

Even as an adult I have trouble believing that any Star Wars fan can honestly say that the lightsaber scene between Darth Vader and Obi Wan is better than any of the duels in the first three.

And you would rather see Yoda as a puppet with a cane than twirling around the screen kicking butt?

My 5-y-o boy thinks that Episode 2 is by far the best. He hasn't seen Ep. 3 yet but has played through it on LEGO Star Wars.

Still..Ep. 1 was a huge disappointment for an adult. Mostly because of overly huge expectations that we had, partly because of the Timothy Zahn trilogy of novels. That and the fact that the Battle of Naboo was won by luck and Hayden Christiansen had as much on screen charisma as a toad. Oh, and also a certain Gungan I could but won't name.

I really think your next post should move into how many National Lampoons there are!

Can I also just say for the record... LEAVE GOONIES ALONE...

I'll agree that there were some Batman like movies on the big screen with actors in the role and at least 3 of them perhaps 4 were actually quite good. But lets be honest. Only one person can claim to be the best Batman - Kevin Conroy. He is equaled by the insane Mark Hamill as the best Joker.

Which leaves Batman: Mask Of the Phantasm and Batman: Mystery of the Batwoman at the only real batman movies. Batman Begins: Return of the Joker is a great movie in the Batman mythos but not really a Batman movie.

I'm with you on Star Wars, The Matrix and Indiana Jones. I think there were 3 Batmans (and the characters other than Batman can make the movie--Nicholson and Ledger are prime examples). And I personally don't care for James Bond.

Two Shreks. The third one sucked as much as the second one was good. And if they ever try to re-make Some Like it Hot, I'll know the Reckoning is near...

OK, there was only one Ghost Busters movie and only will ever be 1 Ghost Busters movie, sorry I hear some chatter about something new, but it doesn't count.

There was also only 1 Police Academy and one Alien and one Terminator and despite the brazibillion dollars in sales there was only one Harry Potter movie as well, but I'm not going to get all hallowed out over that one.

Weirdly there were 3 Lord of the Rings movies. Yes I know they were all made at the same time, and had the same look and feel and all, but there were still three and if you don't like it Elrond will jump into your matrix and bust a cap in your Shire.

Separately, thank god or whom ever you pray to that there was only one sound of music. Can you imagine if that had been popular in the age of 6 sequels?

We'd have The Sound of Music - the Warm Up

Sound of Music - On the Run

Sound of Music - Back to the Castle

Sound of Music - Fall of the Nazis

Sound of Music - The Hills have a Cold

Sound of Music - The Animated tales of Edeleweiss

Obviously, it had to be said.

Right

So....

How many "Blade" movies were there?

There's only one Blade movie, but it's called Blade 2 for some reason.

There were 2 blade movies but they often times get confused.

There was Blade (the very first one1998) & then there was that thought provoking indie film Blade Gets Bad Tax Advice(1999).

The latter is the one where the vampires realize they can't compete with Blade on a physical level, so they form a conspiracy, send a tax promoter to Blade, who convinces him that he doesn't have to pay any taxes to the IRS from his Vampire Hunting bounty. Then 7 years later the IRS swoops in and halls blade off to jail, the vampires take over the world led by Dick Cheney & Ann Pelosi etc.

Unlike the first blade, the action sequences were kind of week (there's a scene in the court room where 100 vampires try to kill blade one last time, Blade manages to kill all the vampires and save the hot looking female court reporter, before sitting back down and having his sentence read to him while everyone is dripping in blood.

Most people just thought the whole 'Dick Cheney takes over the world & Blade goes to jail' premise was too unbelievable.

Chris,

I have to disagree with you (and most of the comments) completely.

First, Star Wars. If you were alive when the 'first 3' (4,5,6) came out, yes, you probably thought they were awesome and then were severely disappointed at 1,2,3. Not because 1,2,3 were bad movies but because they were very different than 4,5,6. BUT for someone like me, who had never seen 4,5,6 and watched 1,2,3 first...I thought 4,5,6 were horribly acted, and had even worse special effects. There were errors in timing throughout, there were props misplaced and they just looked amateur.

Second, Matrix. I'm not even going to say there is 1 matrix movie, as the entire franchise was horrific...so I’ll leave you all to debate that one.

Third, Indiana Jones. Okay, this point I will agree, 4 was awful. But, it grossed the filmmakers an obscene amount of money, so I say they were absolutely brilliant.
Fourth, Batman. Wrong on all levels. First, Jim Carey was hysterically amazing as the Ridler. Second, while Christian Bale tried to ruin the most recent 2, Morgan Freeman, Health Ledger and Michael Caine are stellar. Third, Val Kilmer was by far the most fitting batman. While the movies themselves may not have been as great as you would have liked, Val Kilmer was the epitome of what Batman should be.

Finally, James Bond. Each generation has a Bond, and I like it that way. Mine was Pierce Brosnan. My mother’s was Sean Connery. And my daughter will hopefully have one of her own too.

The final point and overall important factor to remember is that with movies, it is all based on age and perspective. I know that you were trying to prove a point about not messing with a good thing, or coming up with new ideas instead of re-doing old ones, or something along those lines? Unfortunately, with movies, they will re-do something until it stops making them loads of money…and I can’t blame them one bit.

You're spot on about age and perspective. That's the first thing I noticed in the comment flow. As for who grossed what? I don't care. Your other points were really very insightful to the process, though.

I think this is my favorite post by you. Ever.

God bless you, Chris Brogan.

Might I add...Pirates of the Caribbean...only one of those too....

Good call!
1 Pirates of the Caribbean movie.

Bond is Bond - its an British Institution...Its like trying to get him to drive a BMW and not an Aston - it doesn't and didn't work.

what about Jason Bourne....

That's a tough one, Nigel, about Bourne. I liked all of the films, but then, I might be a bit unique in that. Not sure. Anyone?

Chris, have you got the Bourne Ultimatum? Watch the DVD commentary-fantastic trip into the mind of the movies and how the pieced all of the stories and scenes together.

OK Totally follow you on the Star Wars thing, seeing as I right now, in my office next to my desk, have a life-size cutout of Han Solo cradling his blaster, and I agree, Matrix, one movie that's it. But, when you initially thought two Indiana Jones movies, c'mon you weren't really thinking of Temple of Doom over Last Crusade, were you? Harrison Ford and Sean Connery had great chemistry!

I know... I know... I *was*. I was thinking that Last Crusade really had a chance of falling off a cliff. But you're right about Connery and Ford. It was like a weird cast of the buddy movies.

only the penatant man will pass

Oh, come on. There are only TWO star wars movies (named episode 4 and 5). Ewoks do NOT exist.

Agreed on the matrix (see http://xkcd.com/566/ ) and there is only 1 Star Trek movie. As for Bond, there are only two of them, both of them named "Casino Royale".

There are two Bonds. Connery. Craig. In this case, the C team beats out everyone. Literally.

I'd have to add that there were only 2 Alien movies & only 1 Predator movie and they never ever meet.

LOL.
Another excellent observation. Love the "they never, ever meet" line.

Hahahaha!!! They never ever meet is right !

...and there is only one Chris Brogan. http://www.facebook.com/chrisbrogan doesn't count.

OK - so as an avid Star Wars fan that was 10 years old when the original came out, I can say that I can agree. Episode's IV, V and VI had real characters that we all could identify with. We all must admit, however, that ever since Obi Wan Kenobi explained to Luke that he served with his father in the clone wars, we were immediately asking "Clone wars? What the heck are the clone wars?". We also wondered why Darth Vader wore the crazy suit. So, for the back story, Episode's I,II and III served their purpose. For me, it boils down to disappointment. These films could have been so much better!

While you're at it... there can be only one Highlander movie.

I have nothing more profound to say other than, So say we all, brother. So say we all.

(Oh, maybe one thing to add: There was only one Battlestar Galactica. Starbuck was always a hotshot fighter pilot cigar smoking woman. And there was never ever a Galactica 80. Nope. )

Don't agree about either of your SW or Matrix comments. I only really got into Star Wars with my 13 year old son. (so maybe my comments don't count Ha!) And I thought Revenge of the Sith is the best Star Wars movie. What a brilliant display of slow steady corruption by fear. "even the younglings". That's how good people go bad. Ditto for Matrix II & III (although that whole freeway scene was WAAAYYY too long) but I cried when Trinity died. Do not care about Batman movies but agree with you about Indiana Jones..t ones were the best. Best Bond one...Quantum Solace. You can keep Sean Connery. Daniel Craig is THE best Bond. He's got an edge...

You're not wrong, and the point about Star Wars 3 is solid. Seems to be a big thing: how kids impact our perception of it.

Quite right on all counts Chris.

And one Pirates movie.

But definitely two Alien movies.

Mentions of Connery in Bond abound, but no one has addressed Highlander "There can be only...one." In my opinion -- "There SHOULD have been only one!"

I actually liked the second Matrix quite a bit, because it took everything and flipped it on its head. The third was probably the biggest letdown for me in my history of watching movies. lol

Oh, and I'm not even justifying this next one by putting it in the main post:

There wasn't a GI Joe movie. The only Transformers movie was animated.

Also, He-Man never happened.

Love it - yet as a Star Wars fan, I'm gonna argue a bit. I actually feel EP3 (Revenge of the Sith) has tremendous merit and should be included in the list of movies. Any maybe it should be 3.5 Star Wars movies, cos, come on, 'Jedi' should have ended after they left Jabba's palace. After that, it was Muppets in Space.

And there was only one 'Breakin' movie - Electric Boogaloo was just capitalizing on a fad.