Your Blog From the Prospect’s Point of View

When we talk trash about a product or our competition, that can trigger a backlash response. Maybe not directly or overtly, but by talking in negative tones I believe that we paint ourselves with the same brush as we're trying to paint the other with. So maybe we can get away with a minor swipe, but in the end the paint splashes in our own face.

I completely agree. Constructive criticism or juxtaposing a "what if we did or thought differently" is a much more compelling and engaging narrative style. Negativity can be quite a bore, and overdone will just read like an endless cynic and naysayer. I think some people are taking "be controversial" advice too far and are losing a sense of basic manners.

I'm all for voicing your opinion if you can do it in a constructive manner, without offending, and by offering alternatives that move the situation forward rather than just whining about the way things are.

And, if you're voicing your opinon, you must remember that you might think there's a problem but others might think things are fine the way they are. Just because you perceive a problem, doesn't mean there's one.

I've always believed that a little controversy around the table makes for an interesting discussion so long as it's done with respect and a true desire to make things better.

i have learned something from lots of blog and also fromm your article.so thanks
http://www.ecouggg.com

I tend to think "Get over yourself" and then leave if it seems like ranting. If there is legitimate discussion about what could be done better with reasoned arguments and examples, I will read and ponder.

Nice post! Now I'm going to be more careful and critical in making comments. thanks!

There is no point i can disagree with you because everything that you have mentioned in the post is absolutely correct and true. One who is not aware of the comments which are to be mentioned in the post in order to make it more productive is of main concern and who is unaware of this needs to be aware of this first.

I suspect that a fair amount of the bashing comes from people without prospects.

As a consumer I would be turned off to see a company I am doing business with bashing another company or someone else's idea. Companies should stay as neutral as possible in order to not offend anyone. Imagine if your company bashed another company that one of your most loyal customers liked. You could be losing big money and the loyalty factor. With the emergence of blogging and social sharing, we still need to be as careful as ever about what we say and where we say it.

Chris, I think your comments must be aimed at bloggers and other socialites who have some redeeming character left, i.e. they haven't completely sold out yet. Hopefully, I'm in that camp. But consider the millions and millions of Internet users who love nothing better than a good brawl. Seems like all kinds of media are targeted at these folks every day. Personally, I don't watch MMA or other fight shows because it's just plain stupid (and yes sickening) to kill someone just for glory and money. Clearly we haven't evolved at all since the Gladiators of Rome, and online communities, especially political ones, have probably devolved if anything. Bottom line Chris, I agree with your sentiment, but good luck with changing human nature!

Chris my friend, I made some very interesting comments about criticism in the third tribe community. A place where I can share raw thoughts without risk of attack. Those thoughts will grow and germinate over the next few days and turn into a polished blog post. For now suffice it to say we see eye-to-eye (if I'm on a step ladder) on this matter.

Chris - Another interesting take as always. The internet, for some, promotes this type of narcissistic behaviour, which is sometimes made worse by the optional veil of anonymity which it can also provide. Often made worse by the fact some people still consider it gospel if it's on the web, even without the traditional editorial or peer review before publishing, or the disclaimer about intent.... it's part and parcel of the medium unfortunately.

Negativity for negativity's sake rarely helps. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for free speech, but as someone once said if you haven't got aything nice to say don't say anything at all.

Chris, an old friend and the guy who mentored me into blogging and now Social Technologies once told me "Never blog when you are pissed off about something", wise words.

Stuart Crawford
Calgary, AB
http://www.stuartcrawford.com

I agree with Mikkel that "value focused" posts are the best way to go. I have always spent my time letting my readers know who is producing the most amazing stuff and explained why these folks are worthy of their attention. That kind of activity is a gift to both the person you're posting about and your readers. It makes the pie bigger and spreads goodwill. Any monkey can spot what's wrong with business/product/line of thinking. It takes time and effort to seek out, amplify, and explain why something is good. People appreciate that.

It's often easier for persons without an original idea, thought or perspective to fly down the throat of someone else who does. Though we may not always agree with each other, being so negative without adding any sort of value, be it via a suggestion or an invitation to have an intelligent discourse about the issue, is truly counterproductive. But then you have to ask if they are looking to add value to the community at large or stir up notoriety for themselves.

Agreed. I also think if one party is not happy with the way the other is acting in a business dealing, should be given a chance to remedy privately. Too often I fear a blog or tweet is being used as a bully pulpit to tempt the other party to simply acquiesce, rather than air dirty laundry.

I heard one of my favorite lines ever this morning over coffee, delivered with a smile and a rueful shrug. "People will tell you who they are," she said. And I sat stunned and realized, Yep. They do.

So I like your concept of running your race, as opposed to hollering that Lane 6 is crooked and the soles of #7 are too thick for competition standards. Dead weight energy.

The Machiavellian approach: get others to do it for you.

The effective use of negativity is only useful in industires where competitors don't need each other. Automakers are case in point, they don't need each other in order to do business. The auto industry its all about having the best product. If one automaker says their product is best or that its better than the competition one could take it as a negative comment and that is I think widely accepted. Automakers can slag each other and it will not effect their ability to do business.

It doesn't work in industries like residential real estate which is all about cooperation. Realtors need each other to do their job. An effective Realtor needs to have a good relationships with their fellow Realtors not only to excel but simply to get their job done. Slagging the competition (ie other Realtors) on a real estate video blog alienates other Realtors and undermines the cooperative spirit required to get the job done. If your colleagues hate you, its going to be very tough to be top dog. And this is completely aside from the fact that Realtors complaining about other Realtors makes the whole profession look bad...

My input to this is that if you're complaining about it you had better set your own situation up so that the same doesn't happen to you. Give feedback constructively and never jump on a band wagon unless you've done your research.

I agree, I definetely believe that your attitude towards your industry on the internet is a major way to show how your attitude in real life. Employers don't want negative people on their staff, or people that are portraying the industry they are in negatively online.

I agree, I definetely believe that your attitude towards your industry on the internet is a major way to show how your attitude in real life. Employers don't want negative people on their staff, or people that are portraying the industry they are in negatively online.

Interesting insight Chris - I think the tone of your blog gives a prospective customer an idea of the kind of person you are to work with. Critical, or warm and welcoming?
Thanks again (and I'm enjoying the kitchen table videos too - thanks!)

I don't bag on those in my own space, I partner with them and bag on those who are NOT in my space but think they are. I do this to warn people...that is the difference.

Great, great point! Sure, it feels great to vent ... but what gain do you think you'll get by being negative??

Another important aspect of blogging - knowing when & how to promote your blog socially: http://bit.ly/9jRWhA

Chris, it's not just the negative, pessimistic blog posts; but the constant tweets of never seeing any good. (And, I'm watching the Super Bowl tweets). I don't mind crapping on someone, but at the very least be kind enough to provide a roll of tissue. Meaning, be constructive in your criticism.

His Chris! Just started reading your blog, good stuff...

I've actually found a lot of great blogs as a result of someone bashing the author. Not the person bashing someone but the person being bashed.

I'm certainly not saying it's a good thing to do. Just making an observation as a "buyer".

Occasionally bashing has some merit. When there are opposing views on something sometimes a bashing post draws out discussion about the subject. For newer bloggers such as myself it helps me understand both sides of an issue.
(I know, you are talking about personal attacks here. Just thinking about the issue out loud. In type,ha,ha)

There is also the issue of "any publicity is good publicity".
If for example you are promoting a product and their are negative posts about it there can be increased awareness of what you are offering.
If you or your supporters then write follow up posts explaining the other side then it can assist in creating a buzz about the product and can clear up unasked questions people may have about it.

I'm agree about the clients if it's on the firm's blog. About personal blog - there we saying out thoughts so I don't see the problem.

Negative comments and blog posts are so prevalent because they require little original thought. The true work is trying to create your own orignal content, ideas or projects. By taking time to analyze and deconstruct someone else, you keep your true work from moving forward. Plus you give people the impression that you think you're better than everyone else. Nobody likes self-annointed leaders of an industry, unless you're Apple.

From a sales perspective I don't believe it ever helps to throw your competition under the bus. It makes you (the sales person) look petty and desperate. If the prospect was considering or is already using your competitor then you are insulting them and their decision to choose the competition. You are basically telling them they made a dumb decision. Prospects usually buy from people they like...so if you are calling me "dumb" why would I want to buy from you? I prefer to take a gentler approach and tell them how your service or product is different form the competitor allowing them to see themselves why choosing you makes the most sense.

You can have bite and not be "negative" but take a stance. Look at Techdirt - they have built a huge consulting/information business around one of the sharpest blogs on the planet. Mike frequently has opinions and takes sides. Let's not bland the idea of blogs away. Will write more on this one Chris ;)

Agree, Chris. My original intent for my blog was to offer an insight, generate ideas, stimulate debate. Whether I achieve this will be down to you guys, but I will certainly from now on focus intently on whether I'm just using it as a sounding board for gripes. That is NOT my vision, and blogs that do so, imho, are frustrating as a result.

Social media interactions are about balance, expressing both sides and giving a voice to all parties. Blog-type rants plain don't do that. I know, the argument against this is expression of opinion... but, surely with negativity comes, well, if not reason, at least a consideration of the others' point of view?

Great post. The thoughts need more digestion...

Hi Chris - As buyers evaluating a potential service provider, we are trying to figure out what it would be like to work with them. If I perceive what you describe above on their blog or in their comments in other places, if that's what they do - I'll ask myself what's with all this time to trash the competition? I mean if they're looking sideways like that or even behind them, whose stride is affected? If I hire them, could they suspend that, or is my project going to be in competition for their time?

I agree with the commenters before me. Bashing a sign of jealousy. If I'm trying to provide valuable content and information to my readers, I shouldn't have time to pay attention to how wrong Sally is over there. It's pointless. It reminds me of a horrible political campaign. How does bashing my opponent tell you what I can do for you? It doesn't!

It's far more effective to communicate your vision.

When folks ask, we like to say our largest competitors are ignorance and apathy. It gets a chuckle, but sends a clear message that we're not going to talk about our competitors. If you want to find out what they are doing, go ask them.

Negative blog posts in general are annoying, especially when they talk about a topic that is apparently visceral to the author, but their audience in general doesn't really care about. (like tech's Tiananmen moment) On the rare occasion I find myself rant-writing, it is because I had not had the good sense to filter myself and blogging is just way too easy. (Wordpress should build in a 'cool me off' mode) But negative posts draw a TON of page views whereas thoughtful posts see nothing.

Calling out folks in your business space is almost always a bad idea. And egging people on to do more slinging is just as bad, though you see it all the time. If you are willing to say mean things about your competitors in a public space, you are just giving your clients a reason to wonder what you say about them.

There's a way to respectfully disagree or point out other ways of doing things, that's great. Trashing something or being negative (especially if you haven't even tried it) is not so cool. What did our mothers all say..."Do unto others..."

Yep, I agree, but here's the thing. What do your BUYERS get from that message. The people who've opted in to receive your message.

Yep, I'm with you--I think you can graze and/or compare by pointing out your product's strengths & points of differentiation. That's providing information that helps in a buying decision.

I know that when I'm the buyer I'm turned off when someone bashes their competition. Negativity just breeds negativity.

Great post-sure started some good dialogue, thanks!

That's a great questions Chris. I admit I've used my site negatively in way to warn others about certain practices by others in my industry which like yours, has many spammy/scammers.

I see your point and it is noted. I will consider how I'm viewed when readers read those posts.

I use my blog to entertain. That is all. Sometimes I succeed, the other times I don't. But I always try.

Brian Meeks
http://extremelyaverageone.blogspot.com/

Hi Chris, this reminds me of one of Seth's recent blogs "Why I don't have comments" http://sethgodin.typepad.com/seths_blog/2006/06... - I'm not much of a whiner myself and I don't care too much for it either. It may grab my attention for a moment or two, but I won't take it too seriously.

For example, when we were checking out hotels in Bali for our honeymoon. We found a place we really liked. It was in the right location, it was in our budget and it had all the facilities / features we wanted. I read the reviews, positive and negative. And realised that the negative ones were petty and discredited them. We had an awesome time at www.bali.anantara.com and wrote them a positive review.

If anything Chris your fans, your customers and your friends know better than to trust comments / blogs that are controversial for the sake of being controversial.

Best wishes from Manchester UK!

I still think about - and use - your line about Julien and how he responds when told someone he is meeting is a blogger - "Oh? So what do you complain about?"

To be honest, while that was a funny line, and true, it made me realize that's how people think about people who complain and report on poor service. All the time.

I still think there is value - from time to time - on reporting on a negative experience with the hope that the story teaches and helps others to not repeat that mistake.

But these days, I am finding more value in reporting good stuff. That teaches and serves too!

I agree Chris, ranting or negative commentary could be detrimental to ones overall branding/marketing campaign. In traditional advertising however you see the battle of Nextel vs AT&T which continue to go back and forth. I would probably call this a bit more than a gentle sleight. Maybe they get away with it because of the strength of their brands.

Overall I would have to agree with everyone's posts here as well. At the end of the day, it is about being real, however remaining tactful is half the battle. It's not always what you say, but how you say it. Delivery is key and without tone of voice, some messages may be lost in translation, negative or otherwise.

I think discussion about what the industry-at-large could be doing better is good, particularly if you can give some great references or your own insights on how it could be doing better. That's different than swipes at competitors (though I too like the Chevrolet mileage ads comparing themselves to Honda's lawnmower, and I drive a new Accord). If you can differentiate yourself positively without referencing the competitor, great. If you have to answer a direct question, I find "they do it a little differently than I do, and I like the way I do it better for a variety of reasons, let me share what I do that works" is usually sufficient as a preface to why I think my solution is useful.

However, I also think there's some value in critical (as in thoughtful, not as in spiteful) discussion about specifics, particularly in comparisons, or in some "thinking out loud" spaces. Comparisons of web hosts for instance deserve discussion about good and bad, particularly by the community of users. Maybe not by the web host in reference to others, but if I were a domain provider I'd certainly want to point out I don't pre-register and lock down domains my potential customers are searching for like some competitors did. That criticism is a public good - it warns others not to search for available domains on some sites or risk losing them.

On "thinking out loud", I tweeted something about Third Tribe Marketing's community - I joined because I value some of your writing, and that of a few others. I'm not yet sure Third Tribe Marketing delivers the equivalent of what you already have done, but I also see some great potential and want to see the next few seminars. I thought about that out loud not as criticism, but as discussion - is this reaching that potential yet? Interestingly the lessons for me may not have come from the seminar or forum, but from the way the soft-launch was done as a marketing exercise itself - beta testers joined, paid for the privilege (at a discount that lasts, great work!), and then were converted to customers who may be less likely to leave than late adopters because they'll lose their early adopter rate. That's a fabulous sign-up AND retention approach. And the user profile system identifies people by the number of their signup and not username, showing who was there early. Again, great work (especially if intentional). Those are very valuable lessons.

About 3rd Tribe, please tell me you're digging into the forums. THAT's where the value is. The video stuff is okay, but the rest of it is really in the forums.

Digging in? Ya, I'd say - I have posted more in those forums than all other places combined over the last year. There's real value in there Chris, you know it, I now it, and all the people posting like crazy know it. (disclaimer: I pay for my third tribe membership, month by month just like everyone and the moment the value goes away so does my subscription...pretty cool model really).

Absolutely agree with value from forums. I've participated for 10 years in one particular technology forum (it charges for some access) and found great value in the community. The main site is quite good (and is where their market value comes from I think) but the forums have provided me real value, including connections that I've later met in person over the past 10 years.

When people rant about a product or service outside their own sphere of business, I'm all for it. For instance, if I have a terrible flying experience, and customer service has ignored me, then I just might take it up on my blog.

But I wouldn't go trashing a fellow blogger or copywriter. That does stink of sour grapes. (Do sour grapes have a smell?)

The high road is always the best road to take.

Putting others down is typically a sign of immaturity regardless if its personal or professional. Pointing out areas of differentiation and positioning against competitors is acceptable and even encouraged - we all have to do our part to communicate our value. But value is built by an internal investment that manifests in a visible outward quality. Putting others down clearly shows little internal value.

Now, in defense and perhaps contrary to everything above. I once flipped my boss the bird, the "your number 1" but with the wrong finger. Why? Because I saw 3 other employees do it that day and he laughed and fraternized with them. When I did it, I was offered a free day off with an opportunity to find another job. I was a teenager, the other employees were adults. I modeled the wrong behavior because I didn't know any better.

Fortunately, my boss heard me out, understood my position and gave me a pass. Lesson learned though. So, it's possible these folks are modeling bad behavior and just don't know better. It's our job as professionals to lift them up and point them in the right direction.

Thanks for starting this discussion Chris. It's an important one.

Best,
Justin McCullough

What bugs me about the "hater" posts is that they very rarely, if ever, offer a constructive alternative. In other words, if I'm slamming someone's decision to offer paid content (no idea where I got that idea, just throwing it out there), or offer a course in certification, or use their blog as a news feed, I don't mind the idea of criticism. What I object to is that these posts aren't offering the "instead, here's how I think this can work" alternative.

And tone is everything. Constructive presentation of an alternate viewpoint that puts the issue at the center (and not the people) is perfectly fine, and can spur good discussion and conversation. Immature flame attacks, outright personal jabs, and contrarian angst for the sake of it without any indication of an executable alternative leaves me cold.

And as a business person, one that's responsible for hiring both people and businesses to help my company, I'm not keen to give the business to someone that I don't think can ever come up with anything but a bad attitude and unimaginative negativity.

I agree. Your blog should be about providing value to your readers. Concentrate on that. Let the readers form their own opinions on why you're better than the competition.

I believe this flies in the face of what most people and companies believe. The negative posts/adds are created out of fear and even sometimes desperation. They seem to think that being themselves and being open will just nail their coffins shut.

Sad, really, because there's plenty of room, and yet, so very little time on this earth to be so consumed by the mistakes of the other guy or other group. Our time is better spent empowering the person, the group, the world.

Just my 2 cents today. Great job.

I guess, but as a buyer, what do YOU feel?

What do I feel in terms of negative commentary, you mean?

I don't trust it. I see it as desperate attempts to "win." It's one thing to read a review that's negative based on experience, but to tout one's brilliance over another's ignorance is small. It doesn't make me trust the writer, or the seller, or the company. As a buyer, I steer clear of those adds and those companies because I feel they are trying to make up for some hidden discrepancy they don't want you to discover. They do that instead of fixing the problems that put them in the position of running negative add or posts.

Trying to win over potential clients by going negative is often a recipe for disaster. It shows people your "mean" side, and they come away seeing your pessimism. It's fine to point out how you do things better in general, but slamming another company/person/industry rarely wins people over.

We make a point in all of our correspondence (email, phone, blog, website) to avoid any negative criticisms of our competitors. Instead, we focus on how we excel in our field, how we solve problems better for our clients, and what we can do to help their business. It comes across as genuine (because it is), and the potential client sees our good side, and how we remain above the mudslinging.

People are smarter than you think. They can see when a company is better without you trying to lower the bar for your competition. When you disparage those around you, you lump yourself in with them via your negativity.

Perfect post. Who's got time to live there anyway? We've got new ideas to wrangle & nourish. I think we do remain candid to callout blatant warnings to customers as a brand manager - but not to the point that it takes the lead of the post. You'll rot (and be tuned out) along side the "thing" you are complaining about.

I hate it. Ranting in general annoys me. When people use their blog to complain about the projects other people are involved in, it makes me think that they are jealous, have too much time on their hands, and are attention-hungry.

Well, I think you should focus on what other do well, instead of their failures. Of course you can learn from their failures.

I think you should, try to mention your competitors as little as possible, instead of ranting all about it.

You should focus on providing value to your readers. That kind of rant isn't value.