On the Occasion of my 44th Birthday

Chris Brogan Today, I turn 44 years old. First, I don’t feel especially old. In fact, I’m in the best health and shape of my life (thank you, fitness journey). Do I feel more wise? I wouldn’t go that far, or at least not in the way that you’d think it would keep me out of trouble. I learn by failing. Wisdom comes with that learning.

I’m grateful for the love of a strong woman. I’m thrilled to be a dad to two really smart and funny kids. I’m blessed to have two amazing parents. And I’m lucky to have the support and connection of friends and allies like you.

On the occasion of my 44th birthday.

I would tell you the following, to place in the “what I’ve learned” and the “I hope this is helpful” columns:

  1. Confidence is sexy. Every day I’ve wasted worrying if I was attractive or not could have been stemmed off by simply improving my confidence. And how does one do this? By training and by learning. I fail often so that I can be much more confident of what works.
  2. The truth that matters most is that which you tell yourself. Nothing that escapes your lips will ever be as important to your success as that which you tell yourself throughout the day.
  3. If you can’t win by accuracy, win by volume. I’m not nearly as successful as others I know, but because I work harder and do more than a lot of people, I still win enough to be successful because of volume.
  4. Define what success means to you. If you chase vagaries, you’ll eventually catch them.
  5. Multitasking is a lie. (The cake is also a lie.)
  6. Serve the people you intend to serve and stop trying to sell to everyone. I no longer want “everyone.” I want owners and freaks. Period.
  7. The more love you have for yourself, the better the quality of the love you share with others.
  8. Love and work are tied very close together, if you’re lucky. And only you control your luck.
  9. Try whatever you feel like trying. Why not? I launched a magazine last year. Why not?
  10. You will never win by doing nothing. ( Only Luigi wins by doing absolutely nothing.)
  11. Suck it up, buttercup. I spent a LOT of my years being very sensitive. The more I’ve built up my mental toughness, the more I’ve learned how to better interface with the world.(I used to hate this advice.)
  12. Treat your body well. I really neglected mine for a lot of years. Now that I’m working on setting that right, it’s amazing how many other areas of my life are getting better by extension. I’m thinking more clearly. The discipline is helping with my business. All of it relates. And it took me decades to see this.
  13. The freaks truly will inherit the earth. I spent a lot of my life worrying that I was too weird for everyone. The more I stay true to myself, the more I’m able to help others. I can’t recommend revisiting who you really are enough.

Oh, and know this: lots of advice is stupid. The best thing advice ever does is give you false confidence that your own ideas are worth it. False because your ideas are always worth it. Be who you really are, but do it in the way that best serves others, and you’ll turn out okay. Promise.

Oh, and if you’re the gift giving kind, here are where you could send gifts:

Invisible People – help the homeless.
Kid Gigawatt – buy a cool tee shirt and fund autism projects in the mix.
Skip1 – skip a meal; feed a kid.

And thanks!

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  • http://toddrjordan.com/thebroadbrush tojosan

    It’s great advice and it gives us permission. As you said, it’s false though, as we already have permission.

    Chris, your journey inspires me as well as your efforts to enjoy life with family and friends.

    Wishing you many more birthdays.
    Todd

    • http://chrisbrogan.com/ Chris Brogan

      THanks, Todd. You’re a great guy and I’m glad to know you. : )

  • http://raulcolon.net/ Raul Colon

    Inspirational my friend. Even on your birthday you are giving us great gifts…

    Happy Birthday!

    • http://chrisbrogan.com/ Chris Brogan

      You’re a great man, Raul. Thank you!

  • http://momanddadmoney.com/ Matt @ momanddadmoney

    Hi Chris, I’ve just found your site and this post is incredibly relevant to me right now. #2 and #10 in particular are two things I’ve been working on personally a lot over the last few months. I have a voice in my head that spends a lot of time telling me I’m not good enough and in the past that’s led me to a lot of inaction. So the mission recently has been to slowly but surely mold that voice and to spend every day just doing. It’s a battle, but the moments of progress are fun.

    • http://chrisbrogan.com/ Chris Brogan

      So now, will you do it? Will you be good enough? :)

  • Lisa

    Don’t you love your forties?! I relate to so much of this it could have almost been me writing it. Thank you for sharing and have a really fantastic day.

    • http://chrisbrogan.com/ Chris Brogan

      Glad it connected, Lisa. Thank you!

  • http://www.neilcormanimages.com/neil-corman-photography.php Neil Corman

    Have a great birthday Chris, and thank you for sharing the wisdom a true gift to us.

    • http://chrisbrogan.com/ Chris Brogan

      So happy we hung out the other day. Thank you!

  • susantblake

    Happy birthday Chris! Thank you for all the gifts you give to us, especially the giving of yourself. I look forward to meeting you one day.

    • http://chrisbrogan.com/ Chris Brogan

      You’re very kind, Susan. Thank you!

  • Bill Nadraszky

    Happy birthday Chris. You are a real inspiration. And coming from a 48 year old “young guy” I have to say 44 aint so old. By the way, just heard your interview with Michael Stelzner, I am always amazed by how humble and easy to connect with you are in interviews, Have a great day!

    • http://chrisbrogan.com/ Chris Brogan

      I’m so happy you are here, Bill, and thank you. I would be less humble if I thought I could figure out another way to do it.

  • http://www.thewritedesignco.com/ Marcie_Hill

    Happy birthday, Chris. You are giving of yourself even on your birthday. Now, that’s class.

    • http://chrisbrogan.com/ Chris Brogan

      Thank you, Marcie. I appreciate the kindness. : )

  • activesuccess

    From one freak to another, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

    • http://chrisbrogan.com/ Chris Brogan

      The best kind of freak, Mitch. : )

  • http://stevenwb.postach.io/ swbuehler

    Funny you should mention No. 5:

    • http://chrisbrogan.com/ Chris Brogan

      Hahahahaha! Nice!1=

  • MichelleVandepas

    Happy Happy Day Chris. It only gets better.

    • http://chrisbrogan.com/ Chris Brogan

      I sure hope so. : )

  • http://www.unshelled.me/ Bryan S Arnold

    Almost scary how much I relate to almost every point you’ve made on this post. Well those times are over! I’m out to pursue everything regardless now. It’s time to just do it and see what happens…thanks for the post Chris and have Rocking Birthday!

    • http://chrisbrogan.com/ Chris Brogan

      Let’s go rock it together, not-Byron. : )

      • http://www.unshelled.me/ Bryan S Arnold

        You got it! :)

  • http://www.twitter.com/erikjfisher/ Erik Fisher

    Happy Birthday Chris!

    • http://chrisbrogan.com/ Chris Brogan

      Thanks, Erik, and thanks for having me on your show. : )

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  • mikemcallen

    Happy Birthday Chris.

    • http://chrisbrogan.com/ Chris Brogan

      Thanks, Mike. So grateful for our walk the other day.

  • Ted Balowski

    Happy Birthday Chris! Great advice!

    • http://chrisbrogan.com/ Chris Brogan

      Happy it connected, Ted. Thank you. : )

  • http://photoblog.studioprague.com Dan Hostettler

    Happy Birthday Chris!

    • http://chrisbrogan.com/ Chris Brogan

      Thanks, Dan. I appreciate it. : )

  • http://robinmizell.wordpress.com/ Robin Mizell

    Happy birthday, youngster! Celebrate!

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  • http://IMLeslieZ.com LeslieZ

    Happy Birthday Chris! For being such a kid, you sure learned some good stuff along the way.

    I especially love the “The freaks truly will inherit the earth”. My kids favorite line, “Mom you are so wierd”. I’ll have to give your book a read.

    You may not be the most successful, but the people you help aren’t taking a poll on who’s more successful.

    Keep doing what you’re doing. I’m loving it!

    LeslieZ

    • http://chrisbrogan.com/ Chris Brogan

      Well then you’re a great mom! I’m glad you’re part of the freaks.

  • WILLIAMS VAN

    Happy Birthday Chris.Celebrate! I read your book and get your blog. This is a happy day.

    • http://chrisbrogan.com/ Chris Brogan

      Thank you!

  • http://www.trustedadvisor.com/trustmatters Charles H. Green

    Happy Birthday Chris – and thanks for the birthday present you gave everyone else in this most excellent post.

    • http://chrisbrogan.com/ Chris Brogan

      You’re a great guy, CHarlie. Just referenced you yet again today. You’re always with me.

  • http://www.toprankmarketing.com/ Lee Odden

    Happy Birthday Chris!

    • http://chrisbrogan.com/ Chris Brogan

      Thank you so very much. : )

  • http://WellDonePromotions.com Adam L Simmons

    Happy belated. birthday Chris!! Thanks for all of your insight!

  • Loren Stone

    Happy birthday Chris and enjoyed the list. Thanks for sharing.

  • http://www.commercialofficebangalore.com/ Commercial Office Bangalore

    I have read a few good stuff here, happy bday from My side..

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  • http://www.aha-now.com/ Harleena Singh

    Belated happy birthday, Chris! I’m late to the party, and I’m 44 myself. :) I agree with every word you wrote about how it is being 44 and about what you’ve learned – it is definitely very helpful! Great post!! :)

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