You’re Doing It Wrong

January 27, 2009 · Comments

you're doing it wrong

  • You follow too many people on Twitter.
  • You don’t allow blog comments.
  • You add people to LinkedIn that you don’t know very well.
  • You have ads on your blog.
  • You use partial RSS feeds.
  • Your blog posts are too short (too long).
  • You shoot really long videos and don’t edit.
  • You don’t follow people back.
  • You swear.
  • You talk in LOLcat speak.
  • You aren’t using FriendFeed.
  • You are using FriendFeed.
  • You push the same updates to every platform.
  • You don’t use Creative Commons.

Guess what? We’re all doing it wrong. Because we’re all doing it our own way, and it’s not always going to match the way you think it works best. And just like pretty much all of life, we’ll get there somehow. Thanks for sharing your opinion. Glad you got that off your chest.

What?


Photo credit Beige Alert

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  • Oh my gawd. I figured it out!

    Blogging and parenting are exactly the same. Anyone who asserts that they have "the formula" is someone you should run from... quickly (and maybe scream a little).
  • Not me, I always do it... now wait a minute... what was that about following too many people on Twitter? ;)

    Seriously, there's only "more likely to achieve your goal" and "less likely to achieve your goal" - but who says our goals have to be the same?

    Great post as always Mr. Brogan!
  • Sierra Inman
    You make a good point. So, I guess I'll just be me. I kind-a love that. Thanks for sharing.
  • Chris, for me this brings back the question of voice you've brought up here before because if you are truly speaking, tweeting, posting, whatever in your own voice- then it can't really ever be wrong capital W, it's just you and yours. If lolcats are your thing or *gasp* you hate using twitter (I know, I know ppl.) those are your choices for how you interact.
  • I thought I was doing it wrong. But I now realize I was doing it right all this time!
    As my wife is fond of telling me: 'you're so far behind you think you're first.'.
  • Jessica you cracked me up! I suppose that we also feel social media guilt b/c we don't do it perfectly? Good post Chris. It reminds me I need to adjust the multiple pings I have going into Facebook!
  • I double-♥ this post. :)
  • Yep, Chris. At the end of the tunnel, we all know that there is the light we need. The question here is how can we know what's right and what's wrong before we did anything? How can we know the book is interesting? Bcz someone told me, but did 'someone' read this book before? Or 'someone' heard from another ones? We always want to do everything right but it's hard to know what's right and what's wrong :)
  • Glad to be guilty...of doing it wrong and loving your blog! LOL
  • Kerry
    What about "You don't know what you're doing, or how to do it"? Thats me for sure! But reading your stuff Chris is great. I'm starting to think "just be a friend"; so the next step - put the thought into action. Catchya.
  • Lay that smack down!
  • Very well said Chris.

    The real social media experts will be the ones that are able to look at a customer and figure out what is right and what is wrong in each specific case, not set a bunch of rules that they apply to all customers. Sometimes its important to try things, even though others have tried it because you don't know if it will be right or wrong for YOU...and if you're wrong you learn from it and do it right.

    Dave
  • Thanks for two great takeaways. Not only is there no right/wrong, good/bad, should/shouldn't, the bar level for entry, as a result, is lower than I had imagined it to be. I thought I faced a pretty unruly and heavy yoke and as a result I didn't look forward to putting it on. I've feared entry, dismissing my own ideas as less valuable, thinking the 'competition' too great. Feeling liberated now, and liking it. I'll be looking forward to your comments soon! :D

    @DDGriffith
  • We all have one! Happily, these networks are very fungible, and most of our real friends are forgiving!
  • Well, I do have ads on my blog.
  • Hey Chris

    Just loved the post and even better it made me feel less of an island. Seems now, oh joy, oh joy I can just be me and live on for another blogging day. I would love to quote your post on my blog with a link back to yours. Let me know if ok. In the meantime thanks for making all of us feel much, much better.

    Celebrate Life
    Lorrette
  • LOL ... AMEN TO THAT!!! Blogging, social media, etc. is an ART, not a science.
  • Synergy. It's the all time primo-groovy word that we always called when we (my ad agency peeps and myself) ALWAYS used when we played corporate word bingo in the 90s. Synergy is (and was) the ultimate kiss-ass know it all ad hipster's word that screams I KNOW NOTHING! The people that are saying they know it all....they are collectively....one big mess of SYNERGY. There is a point there. I hope you can find it.
  • That brings some perspective to the Social Media presence that we are all chasing.

    Keep throwing the light from up there.

    Enjoy your posts & the tweets

    Prakash
  • I always say if it's better than sex you're doing it wrong.

    'Nuff said, Chris. :)
  • PS - Never type a comment at 3.00am (ish) - you miss out letters.

    That should have read: "If it's better than sex, you're doing it wrong." Obviously.
  • CJ
    Superb post. The only really bad thing you can do is ... nothing!
  • I'm about five days old in Twitter, and still very much in the "Am I doing this right?" phase. Thanks for a post that lets me know I am... even when I'm doing it wrong. Kind of sounds like life in general to me.
  • It's OK to swear. Be careful of children in the room, though, or Jessica might sic someone on you!
  • I have to agree with CJ, the only really bad thing is to sit on the sidelines and do nothing. Krapps too, anything to do with interacting with other humans is going to me more art than science. Even medicine is more art than science or doctors would at some point stop practicing and start doing.
  • Great post Chris, thanks. We have to asking our social media and networking relationships. There is one post on my blog about this topic. http://muratesenli.blogspot.com/2008/12/dont-bl...
    Thanks for sahring.

    Murat Esenli
    http://www.markasizsiniz.com
    http://muratesenli.blogspot.com
  • hehe Absolutely. There *IS* no "wrong" without a defined and agreed-upon "right".
  • Hi Chris,
    Can you perhaps do a piece on how you use Friendfeed as part of your arsenal, and the main pros associated with it?
    Kind regards,
    Kevin
  • Hi Chris, I look forward to reading articles from your blog everyday and this i can say is one of my favorites.. You hit the nail on the head! You rock! : )
  • Kind of like marriage ... keep trying different things until you come to your senses and realize paying an annual fee that can be cancelled is perfect!
  • Some of these things are wrong and some aren't. There is a fine line between "wrong" and "different". Adding people you know not so well in LinkedIn for instance is not "wrong" it's just using Linkedin the way it should. It is precisely the purpose of a socail network like linkedin to make you discover new people (otherwise, just keep them in your private address book and don't bother).

    You know when you've done things wrong when you've crossed the line and been hit on the knuckles for instance... or when it produces no results too.
  • Susie, you got it right - it's like marriage - impossible to keep her happy all the time, but she's so worth trying for!
  • wrong? me? nooh...never! Joking!
    Sometimes...hahah...
    Good topic, again!
  • I agree with what David Spinks said way back in post 12. The people who really "get" social media and how to target their audiences are the ones who can adapt depending on who the audience is and what the situation is. Remember to be yourself, be open and listen to what your customers want, but apart from following those basic rules, don't be afraid of trying new things.
  • Rev. Chris,

    You just preached a wonderful sermon about 'grace' in the world of social media. Nobody's got all the answers, and we all need a little help from our friends to figure it out. Preach it, preacher!
  • Taking calls, making pizzas, what we "experts" can learn about business from some guys who are so 20th century. http://dogwalkblog.com/x/163

    And why I'm beginning to think doing business using all these Web 2.0 tools, Social Media etc is just smoke and mirrors for folks trying to get out of actually doing anything.
  • It's kind of like going to college. Is there a right set of courses to take? How will your choices affect your education...and they will, big time, because just imagine if you didn't connect with that one professor who opened your path, or the girlfriend that became your wife, or whatever because you took a different class, or went to a different school for that matter. Many of those now arriving into the networks are trying to establish street cred by speaking as though there is one right way to do this stuff. And some will listen and it will probably work fine for them.

    The question, which I love Chris, and see you demanding each day: do we have to courage to be ourselves out here?
  • This is right on with what I have been noticing lately. How we all seem hindered by "I'm doing it wrong." I notice my "doing it wrong" things seem really big to me. Other's "doing it wrong" things seems big to them, yet trivial or right to me, if I even notice. I think we are our own worst critics. Thanks for the post when we see we all struggle with the same perceptions it creates space and freedom.
  • Dan
    This one just cracked me up, we all make choices, and we all choose what advice to follow, with the full idea that we can not ever make everyone happy. The circular logic on use/not use FriendFeed just cracked me up. Had that conversation lately, sticking with FriendFeed.
  • Hi Chris,

    Nice list. One thing puzzles me: how do you match "I follow too many people on twitter" with "I don't follow people back"? It seems like you advise not to follow and befriend just everyone, yet people who follow you should be followed back?

    Anyway, thanks for making me wonder :-).

    Hannes
  • Right on man. Going a little deeper:

    We're all growing WITH this industry every day. There are things some feel should be set as rules, some think otherwise. There's always going to be a struggle but as things evolve in SM, as will standards - but there's no 1 end all to SM and what the 'perfect social mediaster' looks like. There's different variations, different applicable strategies, different ways things work - we need to be vigilant in letting the mistakes and the wins happen, regardless if we agree with it or not. Having a stranglehold on what we feel is right and what's not, isn't going to allow for that evolution.
  • Oh, and your Twitter Avatar changes too much.
  • Nice. And there are no experts, just lots of folks learning the lay of the land.
  • This is the best post I've read so far this year, and I agree with Jessica about similarities with parenting. There's always another way to use social media. I'm thinking of reducing my interactions to Twitter, Facebook and LinkedIn but I haven't quite committed to it yet.
  • I am a believer in the Jessica Gottlieb school of parenting and webbing. The tools that worked with my kids so well yesterday do not stand a chance today. And they grin mischieviously maybe even maliciously as they shoot down yesterdays logic. Mike Logan
  • I could hear the What? from over here ;)
  • social media is like teeth . just keep it natural .. care for each of them ...dont abuse them we all have our own smiles. .from .baci the dental dog
  • Ah, this one engendered a smile. Click! Reality. Flexibility. Changing growing. Individual personality. (Thanks much!)
  • You're post is wrong. While we're at it, your face is wrong. :-P

    Thank you for the reminders, Chris. :-)

    -- Finnnnn
  • Henie
    Transparency + Authenticity = Naked Me...and I don't run for cover! :-)

    Thanks as always, Chris, for a great post infused with insight and humor...great combo!

    Best Always,
    Henie
  • This is not news to me. Folks tell me I'm doing it wrong on a regular basis. But I'm still here and I'm still doing it so it can't be all that bad...right?
  • Love it. Great post. I think too many folks have a set dea about what Social Computing should be and the fact is there is no set way of opertating. Just like in the real face to face world where life is messy, social norms ever changing and varied by cultures, so to is the virtaul social world. Its all new, all changing and highly subjective. Thanks for posting this as I think sometimes there is a real need to point out that its okay to lighten up and relax in regards to this evolving experiment in information exchange and interaction.
  • Chris - despite the exuberant enthusiasm shown in the 40+ comments above me, I must disagree. There are clear ways to use social media incorrectly. That's why Twitter accounts are suspended and Facebook profiles are deleted. Wikipedia edits based on speculation are wrong. So are blog posts that plagiarize content or do not attribute. It's wrong to shill services without disclosure and promote brands without transparency. Not responding to comments or tweets is wrong.

    [But naturally, it's not wrong to disagree with me. :) ]
  • Richard Reeve = Great thought on the courage to be ourselves. :)

    One of the things I love about the internet is that there are so many ways an individual can get from point A to point B. These tools are designed to be open ended so that we can figure out what works best for our individual needs. How awesome is that?

    There's no wrong way to eat a Reece's, it just takes time to figure out a personal system. After months of playing around with different social tools, I'm just now piecing together a holistic strategy around my preference for using some of them. For those who don't want to put the effort in, there will always be someone somewhere telling you what to do... :)
  • Rock on. I can't even begin to count the number of times I've been told that I'm doing something wrong in the past few years. I also don't care. There is no right way - there is only the way that works best for me.

    So I'll keep on doing it wrong and be proud that I don't have to do like everyone else says I do. What would be the fun in that?
  • And you shaved. Or you didn't. Because, hey!
  • AC
    What the fuck is wrong with swearing?
  • I've lots of case studies of companies who were ill-advised by social media experts and ended up in PR Hell. Politically incorrect it may be but we can indeed get things wrong. As individuals it may simply be we don't connect with whom we wish to connect but for companies the consequences are much harder.

    Perhaps it's not that we do things 'wrong' its that we weigh up the consequences of one action against the opposite action and accept those consequences. Important to know what they are though (e.g. spamming your blog posts on Twitter may lose you some followers but gain you others). Blindly following "everything is fine" would be great in a perfect world, but many social networks have unwritten rules.

    It's actually fun to find them out, work out the consequences of breaking them and then doing it anyway :P
  • LOVE THIS!
  • I'll just add to Danny Brown's comment:

    If it's better than sex AND MUSIC, you're doing it wrong. =P

    May =]
  • Indeed, so many things can go wrong, better not even start publishing...
    Then again, we might just go out and try what really works - for us.
    What works for us, might not work for other sites, as you all know.
    Cheers!
  • Peter -

    I think there is a difference between Chris' "doing it wrong" and your "doing it wrong." Chris means it from a personal, 'my perspective' way, while your version is more about improper usage as defined by the majority. Wow, I'm really treading a fine line there, but I think you might be taking this too literally.
  • Well, now I need to learn about Creative Commons, so I guess i was doing that wrong.

    Are you saying wrong is the new right? I think so.

    The technically correct are rarely the real winners. That's boring. There's so much more personality in succeeding even though you are doing a few things wrong.
  • Word.
  • OK, agreed - you made a good point. BUT: If we did everything correct, the world gets so boring. Just type in 'You are doing it wrong' in Google and see what a lot of laughter the first results offer... http://tinyurl.com/aq8mmw . Is this not great and another way of social media sharing...?
  • Chris - We're only doing it wrong if you judge someone else through your criteria for what is right. As @garyvee says, don't try to wear another person's shoes. We all have our own way, and while that way will indeed include mistakes, it doesn't make it wrong.Trust your instincts and move forward in a way that works for your goals and objectives.

    This video says it better than I ever could.
    http://garyvaynerchuk.com/2009/01/05/1-show-doe...
  • I'm fat I'm thin, I'm short I'm tall,

    I'm deaf I'm blind hey aren't we all.

    Great post, Mr. C!

    Keep the faith and keep being you!

    ~Ronald
    TrueBeliever & HopeDealer
  • "Your ideas intrigue me and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter."

    Good stuff man.
  • Great point Chris. In a realm like this where everything is so personal and about being yourself, there's more than one way to do things.

    If anything, we should do our best to learn from the way others are doing things.
  • Hi Chris,

    This is a reminder that one size does not fit all in social networking just like in-person networking. We need to tweak and figure out what works best and some else's formula or combination of networks or networking "philosophy" might not work for me. Seeing your list made me think about what does work, and realize we all have opportunites to make it work better if we reassess and learn from each other, our readers and our customers.

    I am writing an article on poor etiquette in social networking for Competitive Intelligence Magazine which will come out in Mar/April. I would like to use your list to start it, since it illustrates what's right or wrong depends on you, your goals, your practices and your philosophy. I do plan to then go into some of the obnoxious behaviors I have noticed mostly on Twitter, LinkedIn and blogging since I think those 3 ways of communicating can apply for the others.

    Thanks for this post...I selfishly needed this...and I will let everyone know where I got it and will tweet it today too, right now!
  • OMG! WTF?!? The story of my life. LOL. ROFL!
  • Chris - once again your post has enlivened my day. Essentially you told me (and my team) to: forge ahead! Keep up the great work!
  • Celeste
    Oy... The tunnel stretch-ith...and the light doth receed! Thanks for the giggle, the push, and the hope(lessness...>LOL<) ;) C.
  • Another wonderful post -- it truly is about being true to yourself, finding your voice, and using what works for you! Thanks!
  • I don't know what Linkedin is. So I must be ok - or not. I just subscribed to Google Adsense. Is that bad?
    Love your posts!!!
  • amurphy13
    What do you have against ads on blogs?
  • I'm with you on everything except for partial RSS feeds. I just don't think there's any excuse. If someone wants your content via RSS then that's a huge advantage to you. Let them have it all! I don't know why they were invented to begin with.
  • Viglioa1
    Im new to twitter and still trying to kind of find my stride with it. We had to make and account in my marketing class so i kind of got thrown into it. Me not being a tech guy have found it confusing to just jump in. That is some great advise though. You really just have to be yourself. its a lot easier that way.
  • Such a freeing post. Like taking a deep breath and just realizing everything WILL work out somehow. Thank you.
  • You have CAPTCHAS in your comments.
  • You're right. I'm shutting it ALL down.

    see ya!
  • Michael Murray
    I appreciate the fact that you are able to vent frustration.
    It communicates a large degree of transparency, and even hope to those that are just starting to know that it is a work in progress.
  • Chis,
    great post! Yes I do have ads on my blog! I look forward to your take on the solution.
  • The beauty of social media platforms is they can be used in a myriad of ways. This is not a one-size-fits-all deal, and those who thing it is are the only people who are really WRONG!
  • Chris, I cannot possibly explain how timely the above is for me this very moment. After a whole LOT of overthinking and agonizing and second-guessing (and and and....) my social media activities, this was like a lightning bolt to the brain.

    Gee, I GET it now :-)

    Gratitude.
  • Everybody's a critic. Which ones are the right ones to listen to about being right and wrong though? It can be hard to tell- it's best to follow your own instincts, and seek advice from critics you know and trust. If, that is, you choose to listen to them at all.
  • I should be really clear: I love critics. I love when people tell me that I'm wrong. I learn from every single interaction, positive or negative. None of the above is strictly about me. None of the above is strictly about you. Some of the above is satire. The thrust of the piece entirely revolves around how people think their way is the only way.

    Make sense?
  • Kind of like McDonalds Vs Burger King - I like it my way - thank heavens we are all unique individuals with our own quirky selves.
  • Makes all the sense in the world Chris -- that's how I took it. Wondering if the issue isn't so much critics, but the fact that there are so many ways to peel the apple, as it were...
  • btw -- and this is really strange -- that pic isn't me! It's the CEO of our company.....anybody?
  • Nicely done! Right or wrong isn't the issue, so the Social Media Police need to find another hobby.
  • Pleaseeeee find a new hobby....
    ;)
  • You complain vehemently about said users in your list. Ha ha that's the best. "I'm going to ignore you now...because you're doing it wrong."

    I'm too laid back to get all freaky bent over Internet stuff.

    People speak LOLcat so what! In UR Internetz Just 2 Anoyz U...

    Too many laws, too many rules. Non-conformity: It's for outcasts.
  • Exactly. Exactly what I was going to say. Bravo!
  • Contradictions are like free puzzles.
  • There is only one way to blog.

    The way that works!
  • nancy white
    in yer box makin' a comment. LOL
    ooops, that was wrong.

    How 'bout weighing in on:
    - emoticons, wrong or just WRONG?
    - tweeting up the contents of your dinner plate?
    (A lot more common in foodie circles, I can tell you)
  • well it is nice to be urself, do what you feel better for you and the community. But also it is nice to follow and do what the books say without loosing yourself. Also nice to learn from others mistakes.

    So what I do is:
    - I network with people on LinkedIN and Twitter.
    - I Blog on my personal blog
    - Post comments on blogs and posts that interest me.
    - I use facebook if I want to waste sometime (i just reactivated my account and barely use it)
    - etc...

    I do it My Way but it is the never the right way always!

    Cheers!
    Jean
  • (i) inspired, Chris. Thank you.
    Comment #99: How would YOU like to be wrong today?
  • I would say you're doing it right, Chris ;)
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